Are You a Whipped Man for Taking Care of Your Wife?

Awww... aren't those plush tampons cute? I gotta get some!

While reading another blog on the topic of guys (mainly, husbands) buying his wife’s feminine hygiene needs, I was met with this interesting comment:

Grown man? Your homework is teetering dangerously between grown man and whipped man. :-P For example, I don’t mind going out to shop for my wife’s feminine needs, but tell me why most people in the store, including women, look at me like I’m whipped. I think one guy even made the Chandler Bing “Whoopa” sound.

On this note, I think gender rights activists are going to be fuming, because the above is exactly the reason why even in today’s world there are some topics, such as menstruation, that cannot come out into the ‘open’ – because it is so attached to a specific gender. Yes, those born with female-sexual organs and reproductive systems will be the only ones who go through menstruation, but it does NOT mean that men should not partake in understanding and management of it.

Yes... these are REAL.. but no, I do not own a pair. (REAL MEN BUY TAMPONS) - and that they do!

Why is it that a man who does something graciously for his wife… screw it, it doesn’t even matter if it’s his wife – for any guy to do this for a LADY friend or family member is chastised or viewed in such a way that he appears whipped. What happened to being a gentleman? Perhaps the person above who I quoted was at a location with all single and childless men and women, I cannot see any reason why a man cannot buy his wife’s needs without being classified as “whipped.”What happened to it be a duty of a man (within a relationship) to take care of his significant other? Yes, perhaps I’m old fashion or maybe those who are more akin to a religious background are few who still follow such things (and not meant to be degrading as if girls can’t take care of themselves), but my mom and ex’s have purchased my undergarments before, so why is it that men/women find it “acceptable” for women to buy male-items but not for a male to buy female items?

I’m just thinking off the top of my head that at least the 11 different stores I have ever bought pads/tampons from, at different locations, different times and even across-town, I have never ran into a situation where I was faced with someone who made it blatently clear that they were giving me “a look” or made rude comment/gestures. In fact, if anything, when I run into another guy in that aisle, we both give each other reassuring male-looks, as we are proud and inquisitive. Likewise, when I’m met with women in that aisle, they give me a comforting smile to let me know that I’m “just as welcome here” as a woman would be and perhaps even in the back of their mind, might be thinking that they wish their dad/brother/boyfriend/husband or guy-friend would do the same thing for them.

People are in relationships, because they have built a love and a degree of dependance on each other. Why else would you be in one if you cannot love one another and depend on each other? Yes, I can foresee in my future that my wife will not be the type to regularly let me buy her feminine needs, but I would not hesitate if she asked me and I sure as hell would not feel like I’m whipped (even if she had me do it EVERY time). I’m a man who cares/loves his girlfriend/wife enough, that I will buy even her most intimate needs – Pregnancy tests, yeast infection kits, maxi pads, tampons, vaginal wipes – the aisle is mine to conquer, so rather than perhaps seeing the next guy buying these things, you should think about how responsible, unselfish and masculine he is, not him being submissive to his female partner. Our world is full of double standards because after quickly asking some of my sexually-active girl-friends, none of the 8 I asked have said they ever got weird looks or mocks for buying condoms and are (regular) condoms not strictly for male-use?

Girl buying male-condom

Buying these products are like buying anything else so why must we “label” these things? People often create grocery lists and then give them to their significant others for purchase. Hrm.. apples, crackers, noodles, rice, milk, eggs, bread, maxi pads… wait what, maxi pads? Why is it that we cannot see it just like the items previously listed – is it because there’s a GENDER assigned to the damn product? Is this world going to start being like, “beef is a male meat” and “chicken is a female meat” and then when I go to buy chicken, people are going to give me funny looks?

Maybe it’s just luck-of-the-draw or horribly uneducated people in the shop that this fellow happened to be in that would draw such gestures, mockery and criticism. I for one, even without a female-friend with me, have purchased feminine hygiene products without such encounters. Maybe you could call me lucky, but I think there’s a major issue when people think being a selfless man is considered being whipped. When your wife tells you to sit and you sit, to bark and you bark, and to pee and you pee… THAT’S when you’re whipped, not because you’re a man for loving her and fulfilling her menstrual needs.

To end this on a slightly amusing note…. Chinese guys should NEVER hit women 😛 (or well, any guy for that matter…) – there IS a moral to this video.. listen for the part where he describes “a real man” 😀 :

I am not endorsing the activity shown in the above video. Furthermore, this is not a representation of the type of person I am. This video has been posted strictly for laughs. You are not obligated to watch this movie if you are easily offended.

*A man should never hit a woman!*

About Prexus Swyftwynd

Probably not a good idea for you to know anything about me....

Posted on June 7, 2010, in Periodtastic, Personal and tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. 9 Comments.

  1. May I say that you a very rare chap in that your outlook to women appears to be positive in all matters. There are many, many men that would think buying tampons etal is ‘beneath them,’ indeed that women are only fit for a few things: cooking, fucking etc. In my experience it is unusual to meet a true gentleman and I am pleased to have met you 🙂

    • I definitely want to stay positive when it comes to women… after all, I love them too much to not be positive towards them. Maybe I should say I love womAn – singular, so my girlfriend doesn’t beat me up, lol. To be honest, I grew up in a very man-centric family, such that, it was a traditional “Dad works and puts food on the table, Mom stays at home and takes care of the family.” However, I recognize that BOTH Father and Mother role play a very important part, not simply because mom isn’t pulling in the cash, but that her role at home is JUST AS critical as ensuring we know that we have our next dinner.

      With that, perhaps I’m also not a guy who feminists would particularly like. I’m protective of my girls and women nowadays are becoming more demanding (in terms of relationship expectations, i.e money, house, car), more independent, doesn’t need to be “taken care of” and need-not RELY on a guy to provide that financial/family stability. I used to be like that too, very dominant type of guy, but having been through several failed-serious relationships, I had to step back and evaluate that I cannot always think for myself, call ALL the shots and expect a girl to comply/obey. I dare use the word, but at some point, I was expecting an “obedient” girl. However, the reality is, society is no longer like that, where a woman would heed all direction given from a husband/man, and I have to respect such changes to our world structure. Having a dad who has always been the head-of-the-household, he had complete vetoing power, but that’s also what held our family together because my mom can’t make decisions 😆 haha – so I suppose every family has their dynamics.

      I have this flaw of always wanting to be protective of my girls, even if they don’t need to be. Having a girlfriend who is extremely independent is hard for me, because I’m just so used to having a girl latch onto me and want me to do things for her. I’m used to being the one who makes all the decisions, but now I’m enjoy sharing the decision-making process, asking her what restaurants she’d like to go to, what we want to buy and things like that – things that with ex’s, I used to just simply make the decision for them. Relationships are a learning process and has fundamentally changed who I am. Things that were acceptable “back then” aren’t today, as women hold an incredible amount of power in today’s society, even in the workforce.

      I cannot imagine how some guys could feel that it is beneath them to buy pads/tampons or any sort of female-product. She’s asking you to buy them, not use or prance around with them. Buying it for her, I would imagine, would win compassion, she does not see the guy as some sort of slave (unless they were into that stuff I suppose). Women should be loved and cared for and although they certainly do make great food 😀 doesn’t mean that they are ONLY fit to carry such capacity. Many women in households now are the breadwinner and not only that, but even carry on duties such as grocery shopping, taking care of kids, gardening ASIDE from holding a job, making them much more powerful than guys!

      Thanks for always injecting some self-confidence and ego within me… I need it sometimes, especially with the way things are going for me right now, I definitely need a pick-up! 🙂

  2. No la… only guys/girls who r chun chun dei would think that a man is being ‘whipped’ becoz he’s willing to do smthg for his wife. There is nothing degrading about having to buy pads or tampons… just like there is nothing embarrassing for a girl to buy male-condoms. When we purchase things, it does not represent it is for ourselves and may also be a sign of love to the other person. It is RIGHT for a male or female to buy any item on the shelf if they are selling it!

    Sometimes if I see a cute pair of boxers that I think would look good on Josh, I will buy it for him. Just like when he sees panties I may like, he may pick them up for me! If u r legally buying smthg, then it should not matter to ppl around u or even the cashier what u r buying and it is none of their business thereafter.

    Like Jessica said, u r a great guy bcoz I know u will nvr b “afraid” to buy something and that u treat bebe rly nicely that u would even get her most intimate items if she asked u to. I hope one day, she would be willing to do the same for u too! I think it’s very awkward for that person u quoted to have been spoken out-against for taking care of his wife. Maybe they really were uneducated ppl that happened to be in the store with him. Either way, being nice to your partner is not about being whipped, it is abt making a relationship work and for it to stay STRONG!

    • Exactly 😛 People make it out to be such a big deal… but I mean, I even remembering my uncle said it was ALL the guy’s responsibility in the household to buy their mom’s (my grandmother’s) sanitary napkins…. raising a family of 6 boys means they were not exempt from “women work” – which is why all my uncles know how to cook, clean, buy groceries, etc.

      I really do hope to learn to cook because my mom says you can really win a girl over by being able to make a nice meal, LOL… and given all the guys in my family knows how to cook GOOD meals, I don’t want to be left out 😀 (it’ll just make me look bad!) She says guys who know how to cook look so “ying” the the kitchen 😆 But Dad makes great food and I should learn to do the same! My dad always said, this way, wife can’t threaten not to make dinner, haha. What a smart man XD

      • Do u know how hot it makes me feel when I see a guy cookin’? LOLOLOL…. not abt juz makin’ a “good meal” – it is just SEXY and also it shows that yur willing to do sthg nice for the girl. I’m sure bebe would love to see u cook, haha… and eating yur meal is not just her putting the food in her mouth, but also the 愛心 that wuz put into making it. Even if u can make “edible” food – that will make a girl go crazy, hahaha.

        I actually happen to think u make rly good food XD even if juz breakfast… can u make when u cm home? kakaka.

        • HAH… you sound so horny 😛 lol.

          Ya, I can make you breakfast if you want, haha… I dunno how early I can get up when I’m in HK though, it’s my VACATION after all 😀 But I’ll find a day! Or you can come meet me at TST dai pai dong and we can have brekkie there… doesn’t matter, whatever works. I like the breakfasts I make too, I’m just too lazy to do them for myself every day 😛 Pick your menu… if you ask for something I don’t know how to make, there’s one of two results, 1) I’m not doing it, lol .. or 2) I’ll go and learn… and YOU have to be my guinea pig!! HAH.

  3. I notice while on your site that we may have a piece you’d like to post.

    ‘The New Feminism’ by Tom Matlack -an article about men embracing masculinity the way women have femininity.

    We just ask that you link back to our site.

    • Hi Sarah,

      Thanks for your post. I will definitely repost and include that in the near future. I will certainly provide a return link and I appreciate you dropping by and taking note of this blog!

  1. Pingback: Afraid of boyfriend/husband leaving me if I loose teeth? | Breast Implant Procedure

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