Author Archives: Poh Ching
Watch the video below =P
The reason why (As a girl myself, generally speaking) a girl yells “I’m on my period!” is NOT BS. Guys may think so, but guys don’t experience the horrible cramps some girls suffer every month, some so bad all we wana do is lie down in bed and sleep the week away.
If the cramps are not bad enough, we also have heat-flash and sweat at inappropriate times non-stop, some of us get accompanying migraine, constipation and bloatiness as well. Its like having an unjustified fever for an illness that happens like clockwork every month without fail, that no medicine can cure.
I myself wouldn’t demand for favours (like the “girl” in the video), but I would appreciate if I were allowed to rest away the excruciating (Not dramatizing) pain away in peace.
Also, we get horrible mood swings. I do know guys who say “So what PMS? You’re a girl, you learn to live and cope with it! Don’t blame bitchiness on PMS! It’s not a valid excuse!”
One: If we girls can cope with your “manly” traits (For example, picking up gaming or watching football) – you can sure as heck cope with our PMS. PMS is a “feminine” thing, just like football is a “guy” thing.
Two: If a generally nice girl turns bitchy – think! Why would she do that? Something you said/did? Or PMS? Pray its the latter, because if it is the first – it means the guy is a jerk. =P (See, PMS is an excuse for guys as well! teehee!)
Three: You think you can CONTROL mood swings. Unfortunately, we can’t control hormones, unless we ingest drugs. Don’t want to mess our body for your (future) children, would you? What if every woman begin to take hormone pills at the moment of puberty? Can you imagine the potential deformed children that might result?
You (the male reader, duh lol) think moods are something we women have to live with, so we ought to learn to control it. What if we don’t even know the trigger?
Four: It is common knowledge that an injured animal is an aggressive one. Pain makes animals, heck, even humans – go haywire. Imagine getting stabbed with the kitchen knife just above your reproductive organs, say – once every three minutes, for at least 12 hours a day (Well, that’s for me, the other 12 are spent sleeping away the pain.).
That’s how bad some cramps can get. Would you be smiling and all-round-pleasant if you are stabbed in the lower abs non-stop for a few days? Get used to the pain, you say? Where is that kitchen knife? Freely knife yourself now, and wait three minutes, then knife yourself again in the same area. Wait three minutes, knife again, repeat for at least one day.
You’d pass out within a few stabs.
Still think periods are BS?
“I want to warn the public that this maid is very dangerous.
“She collected her menstrual blood on facial cotton pads and secretly put them into a disposable tea bag to cook soup for our family!
“We cannot let this evil person do this type of black magic to anyone anymore.
“So please pass her picture around. She is from West Java, Bogor.
“Of all the 5 pictures I have posted, the ones taken indoors are all taken at my grandma’s place when she was ‘alone’ at home with my grandma.
“Could she had taken the pictures herself?
“I have also started a Facebook group about employers who have had domestic maids who did nasty and evil deeds to them, to warn the public and also to let the public know that the maids are not always the victims.
“Many a time, the employers are also abused!
“If you have stories of dangerous maids, please share with all by posting here.”
These are some comments on the Facebook group regarding this incident:
“She is so…Yucks…
“OMG…The maid is so evil…
“You may want to search for groups in Indonesia and paste the same info there.”
In a separate case, a maid was recently charged for mischief. The 23-year-old Indonesian mixed her urine with the drinking water of her employer and her family.
(Original post here.)
Menstrual blood art
Our moon blood is sacred substance. It starts as life-giving tissue that lines up our wombs monthly, in preparation for new life. If no life is conceived, the lining is shed as our menstrual flow. The tissue that would have nourished new life now flows from within us. We can choose to trash or honor it.For many years I have been collecting my moon blood by soaking menstrual cloth pads in water, and feeding my plants with this rich, nourishing soup. The house plants were ecstatic! They shot up as if fed by magic (which they were!) and looked happier than ever before (not to mention the environment, that is given a break each time a woman chooses to stop using disposable menstrual products). Recently, I have discovered the Moon Cup: a little goblet made of latex-free rubber. It is inserted like a diaphragm, and collects our Moon Flow at source.
I was led to a new level of connection with my blood.
Pouring the deep crimson liquid from the moon cup into a bowl allowed me to see my blood for the first time in its raw form. I have collected 4 days worth of flow into the bowl (no, it doesn’t smell. The odor you may be familiar with comes from the interaction between your blood and the chemicals used in commercial “feminine hygiene” products.) Later that night I took my Moon Blood bowl and my drum, and went to sit by the fire place.
The long gaze into the flames moved me to an altered state, and I dipped my hands into the bowl. With no fixed idea in my mind, I let my fingers chase each other in the rich broth, lifting them occasionally to see red ruby droplets fall back into the bowl. I was fascinated. My hands felt like fish gliding in smooth waters, and my eyes feasted on the beauty and depth of the burgundy blood. After a while I was ready to touch my hands to the drum.
I reached one hand and let it play on the drum’s surface. My other hand immediately wanted to follow. I watched as they chased each other in spiraling rounds, creating vortexes and whirlpools, letting them smear and allow fresh ones to emerge. I was in kindergarten once again. The pure joy of playing with color overcame me, and for a while I had no attachment to an end result.
Then a pattern started to emerge. The spiral that sprang from the center felt like “the one.” My left hand made a print below it. I liked the idea of it being an impression of my heart-hand, and proceeded to leave a left-hand imprint in each of the four directions. I stood up to look at it and my mind shifted to “art critic” mode. It took a minute to switch off, and to realize I was actually sorry to be done, since this meant the fun was over… Well, at least until my next cycle.
I washed my hands and saw the blood interact with water. It thinned, turned pink, and disappeared down the drain. I was sad to let it go, and wondered what else could I create when my Moon Flow returns. The possibilities, of course, are endless…
Is this art? My Moon Time drum is sacred to me. It is not displayed as art, for it is meant to be used ceremonially. The power that emanates from it feels like it needs a container, and I keep the drum covered when it is not in use. I have since painted with my Moon Blood on paper and recycled it. That month I wanted to keep the experience of painting as the only essence, and let go of the end product.
I hope you are inspired to try… Yes, years of societal taboos may spring to mind, disguised as resistance, aversion, or judgments. Listen to them. Then inquire within: whose voices are talking to you? Can you find your authentic voice among all others? If not, where is it? Relax into a comfortable position, dive deep into your wellspring, and let your deepest guidance speak. That is the most worthy voice…
Has this been posted here already? I hope not! 😛
If you didn’t already know, “dirty downstairs” is a pet name coined by a sibling to refer to the vajayjay! lol
Here is an article I came across while Net-surfing, and since it’s related to menstruation – I re-posted it here! 🙂
- June 22 2011
Who doesn’t love a good song about vaginas? Created by ad agency St. Luke’s for Mooncup (an insertable, reusable, silicon menstrual cup), this little ditty is intended to celebrate the various monikers of the mossy cottage, the little slit that somehow never seems to have as many glorious nicknames as its male counterpart. For posterity, Mooncup collected over 14,000 nicknames for the fluffy pink tutu, but only 25 made it into the song. It’s a fun way to encourage talk and pride surrounding what is, frankly, a slightly scary product. To put it bluntly, there’s a barrier to entry in this category of menstrual helpers. So, if you have a squish mitten that could do with a serenade, download the sheet music and show your pickle pouch some love.
Kindly allow me to play “Aunt Agony” for today ;P
1. How do you personally differentiate the phases of dating? For instance, before two people officially commit to each other, is it still referred to as dating? What would be the appropriate “description” you would assign it? I’m referring to the courting process where two people have not necessarily committed themselves, although there may be a degree of exclusivity. Would you consider the label of dating assigned only when two people are boyfriend/girlfriend, boyfriend/boyfriend & girlfriend/girlfriend?
Technically, “dating” refers to when a person makes time exclusively for a particular person. You could date your friend for a movie, date for a business-cum-lunch meeting, or date a special girl/guy romantically 😛 “Date” does not necessarily mean you only see a particular girl for some time. Some people date multiple girls/guys romantically. To me, a “date” does not imply that I am being in some sort of or the beginning of some romantic relationship, just that I am making time to meet someone. I could substitute the word “date” with “meeting”.
Which brings me to the next question….
2. What’s the best way to depart from the end of a date or even something casual? Recently, I ashamedly say that my leaves at the end of an event, I often cannot find ways to depart gracefully. I have always considered myself a gentleman, but I’m starting to question that. I struggle to depart from the girl in a proper manner as often I will leave hastily to avoid myself from being attached and overly affectionate. Anyone who knows me will know I really enjoy physical affection, especially at the end of a date. Do you have a preferred way of ‘saying goodbye’ or have expectations of how a guy should say his goodbye when they are not at the stages of physical affection yet? I am embarrassed, because I’ve never had this happen to me before… with all dates I’ve had, there was always been a degree of physical contact, even on the first date. In general, my dates have always been girls out of my “good friends” (or girls I’ve known for a LONG time) list.. that’s why there’s never been a lack of contact-comfort with each other and I’m not sure how to handle girls who aren’t like that.
Use your mouth. I don’t mean a kiss on the lips, but try something simple and sweet, like a peck on the cheek. Kiss her like you kiss your Mom. Affectionate but not asking for anything. Tell her how much you like her, how cute you think she is. Or while walking her up to the doorstep, or in the car (while you’re driving – preferably a few minutes before reaching her place) – lightly clasp your fingers around her hand – just for a moment, so she will be startled, yet not enough time for her to pull away because you have released her hand before she knew what happened. So you get to show her some physical affection, yet in such a way as to not make her feel uncomfortable. DON’T then tell her how much you love her bla bla bla. She can TELL by your fleeting gesture. If she makes an unhappy face, give her an small shy smile. SHY smile, not LECHEROUS smile lol.
3. When it comes to sleeping with someone, do you believe that it requires the same comfort-level as having sex? I consider sleeping to be JUST sleeping and nothing more. I have slept with girls before, on the same bed, but without any required sexual-contact. Do you believe that in order for you to feel comfortable enough to sleep with someone, that would also be the same comfort level you would need to engage in “other” activities?
For me, sleeping with friends is fine. Same bed, same couch, is fine. We love doing everything together! *starts missing her wacky friends* Just NO BODY CONTACT, be it male or female bedmate, sexual or not.
4. This might sound stupid… but how does one resist the temptation.. or maybe the word is enticement of being physically affectionate to a girl (or boy, if that is your case) you are ‘with’? When I’m to the left of her, I often want to hold her hands. When I’m to the right of her, I often want to put my arms around her shoulders. When I’m behind her, I often want to hold/hug her from behind. However, when I’m in front of her, I find it very rude that I’m walking ahead and ignoring her… at the same time, that’s the only way I’m out-of-each from the temptation of expressing my feelings for her through physical contact. I want to be polite and gentlemanly while maintain my sanity. I would not disagree if you said I lack self-control – because when I’m with her, really, I do.
Well, you could stifle your affection for her for a few dates. Be aloof, be cold. I know it’s hard, but it’s the only way for her to realise “Hey, some thing’s missing! Some thing’s up with him!” Then she will ask, “What’s wrong? How come you’re so different?”
THEN you explain to her your dilemma. Do NOT use the term “lack of self-control”. Emphasise “However, when I’m in front of you, I find it very rude that I’m walking ahead and ignoring you… at the same time, that’s the only way I’m out-of-each from the temptation of expressing my feelings for you through physical contact.” .
5. What’s the best way to approach the issue of buying something for her? I want to buy her things sometimes, but I always want it to be a surprize. However, I am a very practical person and would not want to purchase something for someone they will not use/appreciate. Most people would say, “Well, you should know what she likes…” – but honestly, girls have different expectations every 6 seconds, so rather than making a “guess”, I want it to be a well-informed decision. Is it tacky to take her to the place where you want to buy her something and ask? (It isn’t a wedding ring… by then though, I sure as hell should know what she likes!)
Nah, don’t do bring her to the place and ask. Try to gather her interests and what she needs or wants by chatting with her, do it in a roundabout way so she doesn’t know you’re planning of buying anything for her.
For example, “My friends were thinking of buying a farewell present for a long-time female friend, what do you think we should get her?” or “Recently I watched this drama where this girl got a gift from so-and-so and she wasn’t too happy so she chucked it in her closet and forgot about it, and it’s her birthday present! What kind of present you think would suit a girl with her personality?”. Be creative. 😉
If she does pick up on you, you say “Huh? Uh, I wasn’t thinking of buying you anything – I know you’re not that kind of girl.” I know, it’s a little bit of an ouchie – but what’s a lil ouchie for the smile that brightens every bit of your being? 🙂
6. Is it reasonable to want/ask for a date at least once a week? Although I prefer more, she is occupied with school/homework or simply wants to watch her shows/relax/sleep. I try to get her to become more open with the idea of frequent, but short time spent together, to help build enough comfort/topics to talk about. Would you consider once a week to be too long or too short of a time-span?
Once a week is A-ok. More often and soon you may run out of things to talk about. I know it doesn’t seem that way now, but trust me, it will be that way sooner or later – what’s the rush? Give her time to miss you! Time waiting builds excitement! ^^ One of the long-term couples I know (6 years+) only meet up once a week – or twice if time permits – but keep in touch by instant messaging, short and sweet phone calls, text messages and such. If you want to SEE her, there’s always Skype 😛 I know, why Skype when you can just drive over? But hey, Skyping is silly and fun – it’s the small silly things that make a relationship sweet and romantic. “OK, since you don’t want to date me, I’ll date you online then!” – lame jokes like that. 😉