Category Archives: Thumbs Up Reads

Where all the posts related to ‘good reads’ show up…

Girl Talk: Love Me, Love My Period (By: Ami Angelowicz)

Oh my lord, I was  so excited when I read this story! Finally, women who appreciate a guy’s openness in menstruation and being caring about it. Sure, I admit I might be more over-zealous compared to these guys when it comes to periods and feminine hygiene, but it’s probably better I’m like that than the opposite and be those guys who utterly hate and are disgusted by a bit of menstrual flow and products!

Below is a repost of the article which I found from Camster of Kayo’s – thank you for your findings:

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Girl Talk: Love Me, Love My Period

Ami Angelowicz's avatarAmi Angelowicz
1:00PM, 04/28/2011 Comments (70)
Tampon in pocket

The decision to cohabit with my now ex-boyfriend Jeff was prompted by a fight over my period.

Jeff and I came back to my place after dinner to find my male roommate and some of his buddies sitting on the couch. He was angry because he just got laid off. He was drunk. In general he was a big a**hole.

I see a man’s reaction to my period as a litmus test. I know it sounds strange, but the way a guy acts about my menstrual cycle tells me a lot about what kind of guy he is and how he feels about womanhood.

“Wash your dishes,” my roommate shouted as I walked in the door.

“I haven’t been home,” I replied. “I will.”

I looked at Jeff, my incredibly shy boyfriend, hoping he would stick up for me. He put his head down.

My roommate proceeded with his attack.

“And get your disgusting period stained underwear out of the laundry room,” he yelled.

I am never usually at a loss for words. But the mention of a pair of period stained underwear in front of a crowd of men really humiliated me. For the record, I had washed them and left them to dry in the laundry room. A room appropriate for such activities.

I felt my face get hot. That’s when Jeff sprung to action. I saw his jaw tense.

“Who the hell do you think you are?” Jeff shouted at my roommate. “She’s a woman, she bleeds, man!”

Jeff grabbed my hand.

“We’re leaving here now,” he said, escorting me out of the apartment.

I never heard Jeff raise his voice before and I never loved him more for doing it. It turned out my shy boyfriend had some throw-down factor when it came to his woman. That was all I needed to know. We decided to move in together that evening.

Since then, I’ve seen a man’s reaction to my period as a litmus test. I know it sounds strange, but the way a guy acts about my menstrual cycle tells me a lot about what kind of guy he is and how he feels about womanhood.

A few years ago, I was on my third date with David.* We were in the middle of brunch at a French Bistro when Aunt Flo came for a very unexpected visit.

“I have to run to the drug store,” I told him.

He looked confused, but didn’t ask any questions. When I returned with a box of tampons and went to the bathroom again, I think he solved the equation. But David didn’t say anything. He just pretended like it didn’t happen, which in turn made me feel slightly uncomfortable. I know we didn’t know each other that well, but a joke or a smile or at least an acknowledgement from him would have been much appreciated. It was a metaphor for the rest of our six-month relationship. David never really said much about what he thought about anything. So when I told him I was falling in love with him, I was surprised to discover that he wasn’t feeling the same way.

Recently, I started dating Dan* who invited me to spend the night at his place.

“I want to spend the night, but I have my period,” I told Dan.

“That’s great news!” he exclaimed.

“Really? Why?” I asked slightly thrown off by his reaction. I had never seen a man so excited that I was bleeding.

“It’s always a relief for a guy to hear that,” he said. “No bun in the oven.”

In the middle of the night, I woke up and discovered a blood stain on his white sheets. I was mortified. I woke him up.

“Something bad happened,” I said.

“Are you OK?” he asked. I pointed to the blood stain.

“Do you have a stain stick or some Oxyclean?” I asked panicked.

“Don’t worry about that. It’s not a big deal. We’ll deal with it in the morning.”

Dan* reached his arms out and wrapped them around me. He kissed me on the cheek.

“Now go back to sleep and stop worrying,” he said.

Good man, I thought as I drifted off.
*Name has been changed

iStockphoto/Thinkstock

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Since the posting of the article, it has received quite a few comments. You can navigate to see all the comments using the link above as part of the article, but here are some that I found particularly pleasing 🙂

Littlemonster

wrote on April 28, 2011 @ 1:32 PM

For growing up with a sister only 2 years older then him, my boyfriend seemed completely clueless about periods when we started living together (I was the first girl he ever lived with). But now he has gotten completely over his initial squeamishness with it to be totally over it. One of the most amazing things I ever saw him do was empty the trash can that had used pads in it. I immediately panicked when he picked it up and ran over saying “I’ll take care of it” and he just shrugged at me and said “It’s ok, they are wrapped, it doesn’t bother me.” That moment for some reason just completely floored me. I also leave a tampon in the glove box of HIS car. At first he protested, but now it’s like it’s not even there among his tools and insurance papers.

Taurwen

wrote on April 28, 2011 @ 5:02 PM

I was going to the store once and asked my partner if he wanted anything and he decided to come with me. When we got inside I said something like “Well you can go get your stuff, I have some other stuff to get” and he just looked at me like I was crazy “I don’t care if you need to get pads. They’re ~right here~ on the way to my ice cream. Just grab them now.”

IdaTarbell

wrote on April 28, 2011 @ 2:27 PM

I think it’s a better indicator if the guy is willing to get sexy when it’s that time of the month. If he isn’t overly squicked by that, hoorah!

Rionator

wrote on April 28, 2011 @ 6:34 PM

Thank god I’m with someone who doesn’t give a flying f*ck. I get horrific cramps the first 2 days and a good orgasm makes them better for hours afterward.

tabby

wrote on April 28, 2011 @ 2:36 PM

I logged in just to say, Hydrogen Peroxide. It will get ANY blood stain out in a jiffy. We are talking the relatively minor period stained sheets to the dead deer in the back of the light colored SUV. (It hit my car and we try not to waste food.) Even guys usually have some H2O2 in the bathroom.

Also, any guy who freaks out about my period does not get access to my various lady parts because he obviously doesn’t deserve it.

justpeachy

wrote on April 28, 2011 @ 2:51 PM

I think it depends. My husband was an only child and I think unless you’ve shared a bathroom with a woman, it’s pretty easy to be freaked out by periods. He’s getting better though the longer we live together.

lafemmefatal

wrote on April 28, 2011 @ 3:31 PM

One of my past boyfriends was completely grossed out at the thought of bleeding vagina. I was so annoyed with him, because I’m ALWAYS horny during my period, and he didn’t want anything to do with that part of my body. At all.
My husband was completely okay with it. (Granted, he was married before me, so he was use to it anyway,) but he wasn’t scared. Doesn’t care if the shopping cart has feminine products in it, none of that stuff.
On a somewhat related note, I laughed when my husband (then boyfriend,) and I went camping for the first time. We stopped at the grocery store before going out of town to pick up food, and he made a point of buying toilet paper for me to use. (I was trained to squat and use ferns to wipe if I wanted to wipe. lol) I thought it was sweet that he was looking out for me, and I knew I should probably keep him around, but I couldn’t help but laugh.

Now if only bebe appreciated my interest and loving-care for her on/off her period, then I’d be set for life! 😆

Menstrual Fetish or Simply Education?

So as I often wander and drift through the internet, I find myself reading forums and Q&A from sites. Having grown up as a forum-hopper as a teenager, I ran into many puberty-related resources, allowing open discussion between males and females, both questioners and moderators/professionals who provide information or intervene to make an expert opinion/diagnosis. With that said, many of these “specific” forums tend to be more positive towards questions and they’re answered with decency – or at least posts that are negative/insulting are removed/moderated. The internet is essentially “society” – just like when we’re offline and many of the same stigmas exist. Let me elaborate.

I was reading on a Q&A site and bumped into several different threads/sites which had males asking legitimate questions about menstruation. Furthermore, they did so tastefully so it was not a matter of, “Oh my god, please let me have your old pads!” – but rather, “I want to know what girls experience during their period” or “Do girls exercise during their period?” These questions appeared genuine and plus, some people might have called them “stupid questions” – but for males who never experience menstruation – how should they know any better? If they dare to post a question up of that sensitivity, surely they deserve an appropriate response. If the person reading/answering feels that they don’t want to answer, why must they feel the need to post a nasty response. Why is a male a PERVERT, a SICKO, a WEIRDO for wanting to learn about menstruation?

This situation is unfortunate, because women complain about men being ignorant or immature when it comes to menstruation. Yes, we have textbooks and we have school, but that is hardly “sufficient information about menstruation” – that is unless you happen to be in a medical field. For the general guy, simply skimming through our 1-page in the textbook during SexEd class or from the hearsay we get from guy friends (usually non-factual) harbour a very poor perception of menstruation in our minds. We’re criticized by women for being un-knowledgeable about menstruation but at the same time, we’re ALSO criticized when we want to genuinely learn about it. So what is it that women want or rather, do women just assume the information we absorb “from around us” is enough for us to have positive view of menstruation? We need brave and mature women who are willing to provide anecdotal support about their own menstrual experiences and educate men in these matters. We should not be degraded or berated for our willingness to learn – WHETHER this is a fetish or simply an interest.

As I was passing through Yahoo! Answers, it was so sad to see girls flocking down on this poor guy who made an honest question about periods. With a solid page of “answers” – most of them were either unhelpful or downright insulting towards this guy. Rather than taking the time to provide a useful answer, these girls told him off, called him names and made personal attacks – when these girls likely don’t even know this individual personally. Only a few “answers” that were posted addressed his question. What is it that women want? …Us to know about periods or us to remain immature about it and then blame us afterwards? I can understand that women might pounce on a guy who asks a question that is “highly inappropriate” – but these were all reasonable questions. Furthermore, if these women didn’t feel comfortable replying, why even post to yell at this poor guy who is trying to LEARN?

How do we separate the fetishists from the learners or is there that gray-area in between it? To understand a fetish, let’s take a look at the definition of it:

fetish  fet·ish (fět’ĭsh, fē’tĭsh)
n.

  1.  Something, such as an object or a nonsexual part of the body, that arouses sexual desire and may become necessary for sexual gratification.
  2.  An abnormally obsessive preoccupation or attachment.

Fetishes are usually not-harmful by nature. For instance, I love menstruation, but I don’t think I’ve ever “hurt” anyone as a result of my interests. At the same time, am I a fetishist or am I a learner? Menstruation IS related to a “sexual part of the body” (opposed to the definition of a fetish being a “non-sexual” part) – closely associated to the vagina, but is not a “part” itself. Likewise, it “may become necessary for sexual gratification” – and luckily for me, I haven’t hit that point where I feel menstruation is so deeply rooted in me where I can’t become sexually aroused without periods/feminine hygiene on my mind. Easy example is that I can easily become sexually excited just thinking about bebe – absence of her period or any products related to it. If someone DID label me as having a menstrual fetish, I also wouldn’t deny it, as I do have that border of “interest” and “excitement” – but nor would I agree 100% since it is the initial desire to learn more about menstruation where it later developed into a sexual-interest.

What though, separate fetishes over menstruation as it does to other ones – ones that people deem more “common” or even “acceptable”? In the world of men, I’m sure many of us wouldn’t deny that a good bra and panty would excite us. It seems like when guys talk about panties, it is pretty acceptable we think about it – but panties are a “non-sexual item” by nature and therefore, would be considered a fetish. Why is it “ok” for a man to have a fetish for an inanimate object, such as female underwear – but NOT ok when it comes to feminine hygiene products or a woman’s period? My ex used to always tease me by leaving some of her bras and panties on her bed so that I’d see them or she’s ask me to pick out for her what to wear underneath. However, my excitement was not necessarily the object itself, but the association. When I think about panties, I don’t get particularly excited. When I think about bebe’s panties or bras, they’re exciting because they’re HERS and the association is with her beauty and body. The other day, I was graced by seeing bebe’s panties/bra while I helped her pack and I was excited – only because she wears them and not so much the “item itself” and therefore the association with it being SEXY is based on her connection with them. So now, do I have a fetish for her panties or do I have a fetish for her? (The answer is obvious, LOL)

I have to say, there’s only been a handful of times I’ve ever felt bad about my interest in menstruation. I’ve received much praise and kudos for my dedication and commitment to being a positive male role model for menstruation. I’m sure many of my readers know my passion is probably have driven by fetish and half by knowledge – but still, does it really matter? I see so many of these poor guys who should have their curiosity fostered and to be able to engage in professional dialogue with a woman who is willing to answer their inquiries. If they pose a question and they’re hoarded by women berating him, what kind of attitude does that suggest? It suggests that men “do not need to know” or in fact “should NOT know” about menstruation and thus, we become negative towards menstruation through our experiences of being ridiculed. These poor male children, tweens or teens (and possibly even adult men) who make a genuine attempt at learning about menstruation will never ask a question about it again if they’re shot-down, what will they say to future generation of guys? Luckily for me, I have the support of many of my girls and even more proud of my girlfriend who is slowly opening up to me about her period and is willing to answer my questions to her. You have no idea how much that has changed my attitude towards her and how blessed/appreciative I feel over her openness in menstruation to me, especially because she’s not easy to pry information from, especially those of such sensitivity. Although it seems weird to take pride in your girlfriend’s period – I certainly do!

For all the men reading this, please find a woman whom you are comfortable with, trust and is willing to share her menstrual knowledge with you. For the women who read this, please extend your hand/knowledge of menstruation to willing-men around you… for this society has much to learn and crush the taboo of menstruation! If you suspect the guy is learning about menstruation because he as a fetish for it… why does it matter to you anyways? If you’re able to change the way another person views menstruation positively, educationally or otherwise, you’ve done a great job! And also… don’t assume anything about the guy when he’s asking a question – not all of us are cross-dressers, transsexuals or the-like 😛

Lady Case – Home Dispensers for Feminine Hygiene Products

Found some cute little dispensers for the bathroom for dispensing pantiliners, pads and tampons! Very cool and not only does it serve a great purpose, it adds to the tidiness and discreteness in keeping menstrual products at your fingertip. I’ve never tried one of these out, but I’d certainly hope if it is marketable, that it is built with quality assurance and that it is backed up by the company. When bebe and I get our own place, I’d love for her to have something cute like this, although since we both stock up, this will only hold enough for “immediate” use and we’ll still need a separate closet to store the excess. Come to think about it, I might just prefer that bebe leave all her stuff out in the open 😆 Well still, the Lady Case is a pretty innovative and fun product 😀

I’ve also attached links to the official website and manual for those who are interested in knowing the details about these products, including the loading guide, dispensing usage and various mountain instructions.

Here’s a video-introduction to the Lady Case product line (by Style Litech Ltd.):

LadyCase™ Tabletop & Wall Mount Home Dispensers

The LadyCase™ feminine hygiene product dispenser discreetly and hygienically stores and dispenses sanitary napkins (pads), panty liners and tampons, preventing them from becoming exposed to dust and other contaminants. A space-saving
revolutionary system, its special design mechanism dispenses a single clean, dry sanitary napkin (pad), panty liner or tampon with just the touch of button.

It conveniently mounts on the wall or may be placed unobtrusively on any bathroom surface for a clutter-free bathroom.

Discreet, intimate and compact, LadyCase™ is the perfect solution for storing and dispensing feminine hygiene products at home.

  • refillable and has its own indicator window
  • simple to clean
  • multiple dispensers can be combined into a single dispenser for several types of feminine hygiene products
  • made of recyclable plastic
  • suitable for all brands and sizes of sanitary napkins (pads), panty liners and tampons
Lady Case - Pantiliner Dispenser

Lady Case - Pantiliner Dispenser

Lady Case - Tampon (with applicator) Dispenser

Lady Case - Tampon (with applicator) Dispenser

Lady Case - Tampon (Non-applicator) Dispenser

Lady Case - Tampon (Non-applicator) Dispenser

Lady Case - Pad Dispenser

Lady Case - Pad Dispenser

Lady Case - Pantiliner/Tampon (Non-Applicator) Dispenser

Lady Case - Pantiliner/Tampon (Non-Applicator) Dispenser

It seems like they’re doing wholesale and there’s a few eBayers out there who are selling singular or smaller number of units at a time. For those who are interested in a business-venture or would like to try out their products, you’re welcome to look it up on eBay and other purchasing-sources. Here’s the company info:

Style Litech Ltd.
8A Shualei Shimshon, Kfar-Saba, 44391, Israel
Tel: +972 52 2321134
Fax: +972 77 8121131
sales@ladycase-dispenser.com

Thailand Ladyboy’s (Kathoey)

Before I begin into this post, I’m warning you that if you are easily distressed by transsexuals, I would not suggest you continue reading. Furthermore, I’m not an “expert” on this topic and I’m only writing about this on a what I know/perceive basis and information herein is what I’ve researched to my ability and also the opinion expressed here within are my views alone.

The reason why I would suddenly write on such an interesting topic is not because I’ve suddenly decided I’d rather become a female or have any doubts of my “masculinity” – but because I watched a video that really made me think about our definitions of gender, attraction and sexuality. I’m sure because I’ve led into this topic, the following video may not be very shocking – but let’s just sit back and imagine I hadn’t prepared you with any details about it, would you still assume the same? The video contains no nudity and is not “vulgar” in any way, unless you have a problem with guys looking like girls.

Thailand’s Got Talent 2011 Bell Nuntita (Nuntrita Khampriranon, 27)

Isn’t that crazy? I mean sure, she has some male characteristics, but by-golly, from a distance and not paying attention to detail, one would not have thought this person is/was male! Not only that but it started making my question attraction. What causes attraction? When I saw the video, I thought to myself that this girl is damn pretty. Even the 2 guys at the end of the song hugged her. So as I begin to think about my own feelings and reactions to this, I asked myself, would I hug her? Yes, I would. Deep down, I wouldn’t lie and say that I did not feel any attraction to her, because I did – even when upon closer inspection I already suspected the fact she… is/was really a he. Then it made me think, although I would not consider myself gay, homosexual or even bisexual, I still felt ATTRACTED to someone who either has or had a penis. So then the big question is, how do people attract each other? Is it based on what we see, feel or simply fooled by our own sight/expectations?

Let’s take a look at some comments found on the internet about this…

wjboo2008: Truly nothing to say, incredible, especially when he switches to his male voice, and at this point, discussing whether he is a transsexual is no longer important!

liuxiang06: This transsexual is better looking than 70% of China’s females.

挂早小鸡: I think I’ve really fallen for her….I’ve actually fallen for a transsexual… Let me think about this…

爆笑兜兜: Look at their audience, and then look at the audiences in our country. They’re so calm. As if lady boys were simple a part of [their culture], like it was no big deal at all.

This is not the first time that I’ve seen a transsexual. Although not highly-visible, there are often ladyboys in Hong Kong as well, so I’m sure I’ve seen them “in person.” Also, I’ve accidentally ran across she-male porn before, so I’ve literally seen “chicks with dicks” – and although it is not my type of thing, I definitely don’t hold anything against them. Suffice to say, I definitely “had the hots for” Bell… despite knowing that’s a HE. It made me consider what about women, that heterosexual men are attracted to… where’s that “connection” that pull people together? I think about my attraction to bebe… she’s a wonderful girl and is also “looks” like a girl… what if she suddenly told me she had a penis, how would I feel? Of course this is one of those questions that is hard to answer if it didn’t really happen – so let’s just leave that up to inquiring minds to think about. I’m attracted to bebe because she is a good person, beautiful and resembles femininity… but now when you look at ladyboys, how can you claim they don’t have that same femininity? In fact, one of the commentator said that these transsexual look better than 70% of the women (assuming these are genetically-born ones) in China. How did I, knowing that Bell Nunita is/was male, still feel that attraction to her? She is definitely pretty!

Bell Nuntita

Bell Nuntita

So under real scrutiny, I’m sure you can see some defining male features in her facial structure, but many transsexual go through surgery and hormone therapy to modify their body into a more “female form” and while some transsexual still have “obvious” male features, some have almost removed them COMPLETELY. Also, some transsexual even go through sexual reassignment surgery, so even if you were to “look down there” – you might never really know. The following video is a short documentary/interview of a ladyboy prostitute in Thailand… Again, because of the restrictions of free WordPress, I’m not allowed to post “adult” material, so the video is censored at pivotal moments (no sex involved).

So how do I feel about this? I think it’s fine, they’re carrying on with a lifestyle which they choose and feels it fits them. For instance, I choose to follow a lifestyle of where I feel passionate about feminine hygiene and menstruation and although in the view of many, it might not be “normal” or “proper” – it is who I am. Likewise, if these people feel like they’re females trapped in a male body (or vice-versa), they have all the right to “change” themselves to suit the body which matches who they are on the inside. I wouldn’t necessary say I’ve “doubted” being male before, there has been times that I thought it’d be ‘pretty cool’ to know what being female would be like. It doesn’t necessarily mean I have any desire to cross-dress or go MtF, but it does mean I have a desire to ‘know’ that being female is all about – perhaps a magical “live in a girl’s body for a day” scenario. I have to admit, I’ve seen many pictures of transsexuals before, and many are extremely pretty, even beyond what a genetically-born woman would be like and have “perfect” genitalia (since they’re fabricated). Do I think ladyboys can be hot? Ya sure, LOL.

The hormonal therapy is really where the kicker is at, because that changes much of their body structure and facial features. It’s amazing what hormones can do to the body with little effort. Even after a month of regular hormonal treatment can easily change the appearance of males<->females. I’m a big believer of living a lifestyle which best suits you, whether this is by gender, interests or career. If a person feels they are female, then they are. If a person feels they are male, then they are. Many countries have uni-sex toilets and in the “Great North America” we seem to have issues with this as many places you go, you will find washrooms labeled distinctly for ‘men’ or ‘women’. There are some places that have “family” washrooms and VERY FEW that have an “any” washroom to cater to those who do not feel associated with a certain defined gender or whatever. Maybe it’s just me, but I wouldn’t have a problem going to the washroom with mixed genders. The first time I ever went into a true unisex toilet (by that, I meant it wasn’t a “single” bathroom used by men/women.. men and women were in there CONCURRENTLY) was at a University here in Ontario. I thought it was interesting how males and females just wandered in the washroom and really didn’t pay attention to those around them.

Nong Poy - Don't see a penis, looks like a vagina to me!

Nong Poy - Don't see a penis, looks like a vagina to me!

The more we emphasize the need to “differentiate” – the more we feel embarrassment and shyness. It wasn’t only a matter of going to the washroom, but their entire “washroom-related” things were all done co-ed, including showering. I decided since I was there to see it, I mind as well experience it. I threw a towel on and went into the showers and next to me as this blond girl who I could only see “from the head up.” As we showered, she could tell I was ‘an amateur’ and began to talk-me-up to break the silence and awkwardness. I’m sure my eyes clearly avoided any type of contact with her as to “not stare” but to everyone else, carrying out conversations with the opposite gender, with a mere wall separating each other was hardly an issue. As I relaxed the conversation flowed easily and she soon decided her shower was done. We said our goodbyes and as I breathed a sigh-of-relief not having to gaze elsewhere, she tiptoed back and asked me for my name as she said she didn’t recognize me. I told her my name, mentioned that I was only staying as a guest and that she probably wouldn’t see me again. At that point, I also noticed she was not covered in a towel and was fully nude in front of my stall with her boobs just there. Now I think back, I don’t even know if I had an erection or not, LOL.

Anyways, Kathoey’s can vary in degree of femininity, whether it is simply dressing as one (cross-dressing), speaking like one or even go the whole-nine-yards making physical changes, breast implants, hormone replacement, butt augmentation and getting rid of a very male-feature, the adam’s apple. Because of my interests in periods, I’ve also stumbled upon many cross-dressing, sissy, transgendered lifestyle based sites. I have definitely done some reading around and just to learn, while I do not have the seem yearning for femininity for myself, I can definitely appreciate what they go through, sometimes involving physical pain, mental anguish and pressure from society. I’ll have to say, some of the voice-changes that can happen is just amazing.

It would appear that ladyboys in Thailand culture is very open compared to most places. Judging from the reactions of the audience, when Bell was discovered as a transsexual during the voice/song switch, people didn’t seem to bat an eye. Both the guys and the girls erupted in applause and even the guys (knowing that Bell is/was a ‘he’) still seemed to really have the hots for her. Although I’ve never been to Thailand, I’ve already heard many stories of the ladyboys there and how prominent they are. I’ve also been warned about being very careful there, because you don’t know whether you’re pushing your dick into a “real” or “fake” vagina 😆 I don’t have the exact comment, but one of the comments posted up on a forum (regarding Bell Nuntita as a transexual) said something along the liens of, “If you’re going to have sex with an ugly girl, mind as well have sex with a ladyboy!” and also I found this funny but true quote…:

Bo Wang: I’d totally hit that.

Elijah: Yeah man, same here.

I mean really, if you’re going anal with a lady or lady boy what’s the difference?

I’d tap that ass (with a condom of course).

You know you would too…

So although one would think that being a straight male, we’d automatically be repulsed by the thought of having sex with a ladyboy, the idea may not be all that far-fetched. So there you have it, a bit of understanding into the ladyboy culture (a very SMALL understanding at that) and also that this is quite “common in Thailand. I would not say that they’re treated “equals” to non-transsexual counterparts, but what I can say for sure is that they get much better treatment within their Thailand society than in other places in the world, especially places like Canada and the U.S. The things I even see happen here locally and the segregation and mockery that happens to those of the LGBTQ individuals makes me shake my head. I’m sure many of you might wonder why I don’t fall into that community despite my interests in femininity, feminine hygiene and such, but I like all that stuff because I’m a heterosexual male who LOVES the female body 😛 not so much that I “want to be one” 😀

Moms Say the Darnest Things…

So let me start by talking about a little “incident” over the last week that has been kind of creepy (although, positively creepy). About 2 weeks ago I had a coworker who is a big fan of psychics and each year, about this this time of year, they come to our city. Ever since my dad passed away, each time she goes to the psychic, they would be always sense my dad’s presence as not only were they coworkers, but great friends as well. At around 8PM the night she went to the psychic fair, she sent me a funny message saying that my dad came through “very strong” and that he was asking about what happened with the car (I recently had work done on my car due to some fuel efficiency problems) and that he is waiting for his grandchildren now! I laughed and although it’s always nice to hear things about deceased loved ones, I guess sometimes you are skeptical about how reliable the information is or how “real” these things are. Suffice to say, our family is what I would deem as a “spiritual” family… we believe that there’s more to life than what meets the eye and although we are not highly religious of sorts, we do practice our faith to a degree. While I would hardly consider ourselves “devotedly religious” by any means, we also don’t think that human life is as simple as birth and death.

I did not show my mom the message yet because my mom yet, although I did show bebe who got a chuckle. A few nights later, my mom woke up in the morning and was in a very cheery mood because she told me she had finally seen my dad (via a dream) since he hasn’t “visited” in a while. My mom is one of those people who sometimes I wonder if she has “special powers”… because many times things she saw in dreams have become ‘true’ or has manifested itself in one way or another. I’m not going to say EVERY dream she ever had happened, but certainly, I’m always scared when she tells me about her dreams. She said that she saw our family (including my dad) enjoying a gathering with her best-friends mother (let’s just call the friend E and her mom C). Also in the same night, my mom also told me dad had a conversation with her and asked her to tell me, “呀仔加油畀心機追你嘅女朋友!” (My son, continue your efforts in chasing your girlfriend!). Like I said, sometimes I am skeptical about what my mom tells me from dreams because she has an “overactive mind”… but what I’m going to tell you to follow is freaky. However, assuming that dreams can sometimes help bridge “human life” and “spiritual life” – I’d be very happy to say that my dad approves of bebe and that we will have a successful relationship as long as we’re willing to devote effort into each other.

3 days ago, E called my mom and told her she was very excited because all of a sudden her mom, C… called E and told her that she will be coming to Canada as a “last minute” plan to enjoy the start of Canadian spring. My mom was shocked… because just a week ago, she had a dream about C being in the dream with my dad and our family at a gathering… How could the dream have been so realistic, is this something my dad was “telling” my mom that she would be coming? E & C are very good friends of our family, so therefore we’ve always had a great relationship with them so it wouldn’t be a surprize if my dad “reported” to my mom to expect a visitor. My mom had this weird look when she put down the phone.. I guess shock and surprize. C has not come to Canada to visit E (her daughter & my mom’s best friend) since 2006 because of some major injuries and surgury. All of a sudden, after my mom’s dream, days later C actually called E telling her that she was coming and gave her the itinerary.

Ok… so yes, we could all say this was just an “unusual coincidence” that my mom dreamt of a gathering with my Dad, our family and C… but dreams after often “recollections” of things that have happened or manifest itself into our minds… but this situation that was predicted HASN’T HAPPENED and in fact, just “became true”… I guess in a way, it validates that sometimes my mom has this unusual nack for connecting spiritually with my father (after all, they WERE married and soul-mates, this wouldn’t be a surprize) and also, dreams I have about my father are usually very strong and supportive. Many times, I’ve had things my dad told me to be aware of through dreams really did come true. It is kind of freaky. At the same time, this is a very warm feeling knowing that dad is always around to protect us and to give us guidance when we need it. Most importantly, I know that my dad, even beyond the grave, approves of bebe and he encourages me to pursue her love. Now with my mom and dad’s approval of bebe, I’m all in! Hey, my love-life has steadily improved with bebe and I think she is even to begin feeling a little – so thanks to all the blessings of (living) family and friends and also that of our ancestors and the heavens.

Yesterday, I mentioned to bebe that in the near future, I’d like to open up a bank account for her and put a bit of money in every week so she’d have some extra money to spend. I have only did this with ONE other serious girlfriend before and I’m always very careful about it… after all, I don’t want to be used by a gold-digging girl. Furthermore, I’ve used this in the past as a “test” to see how well the girl manages money, responsibility and practicality as well. Although I’m going to wait until bebe and I are on better terms, I have a feeling that this relationship will become successful. She mentioned that one of her friend’s boyfriend does this as well and thought perhaps this is “common” — I told her this is HARDLY the case. I’ve asked around my friends before and most of them are like, “Dude, are you stupid? You should NEVER give her girlfriend money like that…” and most of them don’t even see that happening even POST-MARRIAGE, let alone dating. I questioned myself to make sure I “felt” the want to give bebe some spending money as well as whether it is a SMART choice to make – because we all know money can ruin women 😛

Through major deliberations, I decided to run the idea through bebe to see what she says. She of course said, “Oh you don’t need to do that” – but I couldn’t tell if it was the usual “girl humbleness” to not make herself look like she WANTS that money, or deep down she really loves the idea of having two purses to spend (her parents and mine, lol). From what I’ve seen, bebe is fairly responsible with money, that is why I even contemplated this in the first place. I still need lots of in-depth time to “study” what kind of person bebe is… I mean yes, I do trust her, but I am also practical in the sense I’m not stupid enough to let a girl take advantage of me. I do want to know without a doubt that she is trustworthy and not playing me for a fool. This is not only the case with money, but even for other things. Deep down in my heart, obviously I trust her, but on the surface using LOGIC – I definitely have to keep my smarts about it and not let my emotions consume me. I guess we will find out her genuineness in time. I went to the bank to give her some money yesterday, something nice for her to spend while she’s out there with her friends and stuff, I want to hope that was the right decision.

So today my mom asked me while shopping what we do about handling bills. For the most part, 9 out of 10 times, I would say I pay the bills or any type of dating expenditures. Am I really old fashion to think that the guy always has to pay? I know that especially in an era now that we “casually date” and that there are “open relationships” – dating couples have opted to do 50/50. Maybe I’m too old fashion to accept that a girl should pay. My mom asked because she wanted to know whether bebe ever bothers pulling out her wallet or that it is in her expectation that I am always the one paying. My mom likes to know details because people in relationships are often blind to things… she just wants to make sure I’m not being used. Even my mom said, when she was young, many guys would offer to take her out and every night, she could always get free dinners if she wanted to. Likewise, my mom said that I have to be smart about watching how bebe is treating me, whether she is being equitable in paying when we go out. After all, she doesn’t want her son being rung dry by a girl who simply wants “a good night out” with no expense to her. Bebe certainly has paid for our food/activities before but I think she also won’t get into a fight with me about it, LOL. Although I love bebe very much, I am still “cautious” of these things, so I’m not totally blind yet by bebe, haha.

Date One: Yes, Make the Offer
Most men want to treat on the first date. He wants to show that he is in fact a gentleman. This fine young man will reach for the check when the conversation has settled a bit, pretend to check the figures, and take out his wallet. What should you do? Ask if you can contribute by paying the tip or part of the bill (be prepared just in case he takes you up on it). This is your way of acknowledging his gesture. We just want the offer. A sweet thank-you is also appreciated. That is all men really want — some simple recognition. But, do not go further than making the offer — do not insist on paying your half, even if you’re having the worse time of your life. This is like saying to the guy, “I could never be interested in you.”

Dates Two and Three: Actually Making a Contribution
Out for dinner once again, maybe a movie this time, or bowling or a dance club, etc. Some money is being spent somewhere. Again offer to contribute. Again say thank you when he insists on paying. However, this time find some way to make a contribution. Examples: Buy the popcorn at a movie, buy a round of drinks at a bar, buy some ice cream after dinner. Many guys will say that is not necessary, but it is definitely appreciated.

Dates 4 and Beyond: Time to Insist
Most men like when the women take the wheel for a night or two. Once you are “dating,” you should plan a night and insist on paying. This gesture again is a nice way to recognize that you appreciate your guy being generous on dates one through, and now it is your turn. A nice guy will offer to contribute and it is okay to reject his contribution.

Having read some articles recently, it does appear that “bill splitting” seems to be common on dates now. Weird for me, but I guess that’s how society is moving now – or even if you don’t split the bill, at least make sure the night is “even” between the parties… i.e if someone paid for lunch, then the other should pay for dinner – or something like that. I guess the thing is that a lot of these rules apply to “casual dating”… and right now, I don’t think there’s anything “casual” about bebe and I, lol. Any guy who even thinks about going after bebe right now is asking to cut their lifespan considerably as a bullet will find its way to their throat very quickly. But anyways, bebe has always done her share and has never made it an issue to cover any remainders (especially when cash is involved, OOPS) or to pay the outstanding tip or whatever. It seems like lots of people recommend “talking about bill-splitting” – but that’s an awfully weird conversation to have.

1 Talk about how to split the bill in the first few weeks of dating. Ask your date if they want to always split the bill so no one feels obligated. The beautiful part of this is since you both expect to pay there won’t be awkwardness when the bill arrives.

2 Take turns paying. If your boyfriend paid for dinner last time, just grab the check when it arrives! This way you can go back and forth and it’s essentially the same as splitting the bill.

3 Split the cost of the evening instead of splitting a single bill. When you’re going to dinner and a movie on a single night, ask the person you’re dating if they’d like to pay for the movie or for dinner, and tell him or her you’ll pay for whichever they don’t choose.

4 Avoid being insistent about paying. Some men and women can actually become offended by the idea of someone constantly paying for them (or even paying just once). If your date says no and insists on splitting the bill, it’s best to just agree.

5 Be honest when you can or cannot afford to split the bill. It’s better to just let your partner know you’d rather go to a coffee shop than to a 5-star restaurant.

Tips & Warnings

Set aside some money for every time you go out, specifically for the purpose of splitting the bill. It’s best to always assume you are paying for your share so as not to appear like you are taking advantage of your partner.

Don’t make taking the bill on yourself a habit. The more you pay, the more it will become expected, and you’ll be stuck every time you go out with paying for the meal or the movie. Offer from time to time, but also ask, “Wanna split it today?”

Interesting on that last one about the “warning”… I wonder if it’s true. I’m not sure… right now, maybe I’m being stupid, but I consider bebe “just like family” and my sweetheart… I try not to think of us as “you” and “me” – but rather, “us”… so what’s the big deal about spending our money? I think most people would say I’m playing a dangerous game here, allowing a girl to: get money out of me, have dinners & activities paid for, her personal chauffeur.. etc. Am I being too innocent or is it because I’m so committed to her I feel there shouldn’t be a separation? I’m sure there’s always a risk of being used, but seriously, bebe treats me great and if she wasn’t being genuine about her feelings for me, she could use me but give me NOTHING in return and I’d still be enough to do it. The fact she’s making a very real effort, I would like to assume/feel this is all real and not fake.

I’ve also noticed that bebe isn’t very picky when it comes to choosing a place (in the sense she will not always demand we go “somewhere nice”)… we can eat nicely or eat casually – that to me is very important. If she asked me to take her to a nice place EVERY time and expected me to pay, then for sure my mind would start noticing something wrong. I dislike wasting food, so I always try to not over-order and I expect the same of bebe. I would never have an issue for paying for food she can eat, but I would be upset if she ordered lots and didn’t eat it. Having a “bit of food left” at the end is very different than “ordering a table full of food to eat a plate.” I love the way that bebe makes me feel good about never having given me flack for places I’ve taken her in terms of whether it was “up to her standards” e.g high-class restaurant versus a locals joint. I think I noticed that most when I was with her in HK where she was more than happy to accompany to eat at not-so-nice places. I followed through by reading a question a reader posted up on the AskMEN site… http://www.askmen.com/dating/doclove_100/132_relationship_expert.html entitled “Does She Love Me For My Money?” – it makes you think although this is definitely NOT how I feel about bebe.

My mom said she recommended me to sometimes stay at home and do things with bebe and just cook together. Bebe in the past have told me she dislikes when we eat at home because she has to do the dishes. I always tell her I can do the dishes if she doesn’t want to. I don’t want this to become a valid excuse for her not to eat at home. My mom says that the “highest level of genuineness from a girl” is making a meal with each other at home. She should be willingly to make a meal for a guy, not necessarily “the best meal ever” – but showing that she doesn’t always want to just dine out and that cooking as a couple is not simply the objective of “putting food in our mouths” – but a FUN experience of COOKING TOGETHER. This isn’t something I’ve never thought of before, in fact, the past month I’ve been always offering to let’s cook at her house. It has hurt me that each time she always uses the “dishes” excuse… and let’s just say IF dishes are a problem, can she not at least find it in her to eat at home sometimes? Sure it is a hassle, but I’m not asking her to do that on EVERY date, just that being able to spend time in the kitchen with each other, learning a new recipe or trying a new meal – even if we FAIL it, at least we have an experience and memory. Right now, this is the only thing I’m kind of upset about on why we HAVEN’T done this yet – why does she a) use the same excuse, b) not just be willing to do the dishes regardless of the complaint and c) learn to appreciate some home-cooked meals with me. I like “variations” in my life… I do not expect her to invite me over every night to eat, but I also don’t want to go out to eat all the time and not have HER at least sacrifice a bit of her unwillingness to do the dishes/make a mess as a justification for not being in the house/kitchen. I kind of got annoyed when I was looking at pictures I had saved on my phone with bebe, I could clearly note she had parties with her friends at her house (with the kitchen clearly visible) – so my challenging question to her would be why you let YOUR friends come over and prepare food in the kitchen, but not ME? This has only been a small matter for me, but I can slowly feel it manifesting inside me towards dissatisfaction of “equality” between her friends and I and the lack of motivation for her to “do something for me.”

Anyways, last night really ended up well so I don’t want to let something small make me question her motives and feelings. I need to be more positive about outlook at things she does because sometimes her actions does make me think, but at the same time, I’m not going to be too hasty and judge her too quickly. Obviously if something’s amidst over time, then I will act on it, otherwise, it may be just a simple “phase” thing that she’s going through. Maybe it just doesn’t cross bebe’s mind that something as simple as “not offering to cook at home” is not offensive, but to me, it makes me wonder WHY a girl who I’ve been with this long hasn’t at least offered once to make something for me at home but fobbing me off with excuses. I know her kitchen isn’t in the best condition or the most romantic setting, but come on… If I have to pressure her to do it, then it has no meaning. Sometimes I think we need to do things from the heart and not simply because we have to be “asked” to do something. Maybe this is the problem with girls who have not had more relationship experience, so maybe I do need to “teach” her these things or explain to her “this is how I see the current situation”… but ya…. well who knows, maybe she’ll kick up the role a bit later. Even if she doesn’t know how to cook a lot, at least we can make “quick-fix foods” or she can even feel motivated enough to LEARN something just for the sake of making a sweet-dinner.

My mom truly believes that girls should be “responsible” as well when it comes to paying on dates… it’s not a matter of being so calculative as in… the bill is $50, so therefore you owe $25 and I will pay $25… but a matter of that there should be equality and an acceptance of responsibility and not being the rung through the dryer. I don’t mind bebe not always paying particularly because she’s still using her parents money and not earning any income, so hopefully she’ll start being a bit more prudent about us doing stuff together around-the-house and making food together as a way for us to “become closer.” I know for the rest of my life I will be catering for bebe and that’s MY fault for loving her so deeply and to allow myself to do that… but I also want a bit of that ‘return’… which bebe has told me she’s not ready to return that sacrifice yet… but everyone has a tolerance level and it’s like those nuclear reactors in Japan… those reserves can withstand a degree pressure, lack of water to keep it cool and can go without maintenance for a bit… but not giving it water when it needs it and letting it wear down to a dangerous point is a recipe for an explosion. I don’t want to ever have to reach that point where I need to point out to her that she treats her friends better than me and that she’s not being “fair” about it and have me even become explosive on her friends – because that won’t be nice… maintain those reactors, do patch-work, be diligent about keeping the water levels topped up and all will be fine. Excuses don’t cut it in a relationship, the only PRACTICAL solution is to do something about it.

Just like one of my annoyed friends use to say when he saw those “closed” signs on business doors, “Sorry, we are closed at the moment.” and he always hissed, “If you were fucking ‘sorry’ then you would be OPEN right now!” — lol… I mentioned to bebe that I’m free during the weekdays too if she wants to go out or whatever, whether she’s returning back to town or whether she wants me to go out there to meet her… I wonder whether she’ll actually heed it.

Honoured by the SCA Hygiene Matters

Girl with Libresse feminine care product in her jeans pocket - SCA

Girl with Libresse feminine care product in her jeans pocket - SCA

A few days ago, I was deeply honoured to be listed at an official SCA site. I have always felt touched when fellow bloggers have linked to my site or when people republish (with credits obviously) my articles and such. Even being recognized by tweets, groups or individuals truly bring merit to the taboo of menstruation which I am trying to fight down. Suffice to say, this time, being listed by a worldwide company is truly an honour and privilege! Although I’m not sure how long it will be up before another site succeeds my site, just getting the chance to have my site recognized by a reputable feminine hygiene (and other things) manufacturer just makes my heart melt!

Honestly, I wish SCA had a larger presence here, I’d totally be buying their products. You know, it’s not a matter of them bribing me or giving me this opportunity to appear on their site, but the fact that they’re not discriminating against males who are as interested in making PERIODS a openly-discussed subject. I’ve noticed “some” companies in Canada do not encourage or promote the idea that males should be involved in such a subject. They can make claims all they want, but their real public stance is that periods are “for female only.” In an age where people want equality and to be free of discrimination, I should have as much of a right to participate in the promotion of menstruation and feminine hygiene as much as a female should. Furthermore, these companies should be reminded that I buy their products as well and REGARDLESS of my uses for it, I am a paying and decent customer who should not have my gender played against me. Naturally, I do not menstruate or require feminine hygiene products, but certainly, I should be able to speak and give opinions on matters.

SCA Hygiene Matters - Men In Menstruation

SCA Hygiene Matters - Men In Menstruation

I’d like to express my deepest thanks to SCA (or well probably only one person made the decision, LOL) for giving this blog an opportunity to show up on a “big name” site and without further ado, everyone, please go check out some of these great SCA Hygiene links:

Now… if only SCA would bring some of their awesome feminine hygiene products to Ontario, that’d be WONDERFUL! >_< I’m stuck with the damn “big 3” right now here, arg!

Speaking of which, the Senior Advisor Hygiene at SCA, Rolf Andersson is MALE 😀 Yay.

I also noticed on the side of thier page that says…

So how many voices does it take to break a taboo? During a 28 day run starting on International Women’s Day March 8th, we want to find out. Let’s join together and break the taboo. It’s easy. Just say it. Period.

That makes me sad… what’s going to happen after? 😦

I don’t want it to end just like that… Period. 😆 If it were up to me, I’d want my bebe to have her period 365 days a year! 😀 Of course she’d kill me if I told her I thought that, haha.

If only I could find a reasonable way of buying their products somewhere without paying massive shipping fees or something, bleh. Look at this awesome new product that I could be testing right now!! =O Maybe I should pursue that feminine hygiene career that everyone has always been encouraging me to… harhar!

It angers me that SCA products are available in Canada AND even have Canadian operating presence… nevertheless, the only two SCA brands here are Tena (Incontinence products) and TORK (Cleaning/Home bathroom products). Offices/plants exist in Oakville and Drummondville in Ontario too… shame that they should break into the pad/tampon business here too. 😐

SCA Libresse Night Towel

SCA Libresse Night Towel

Feminine Hygiene Products and Your Vagina is Repulsive. Period.

Hygiene Matters. Period.

Hygiene Matters. Period. (SCA)

Holy crap, before someone shoots me, that is not what I think – it just happens to be the topic of my entry and also the general sentiment within the media industry. Having a short discussion with one of my readers via comments on my blog, he brought up an excellent point – that because of culture and religion, menstruation is “viewed” very differently. I’m going to start to touch on this topic for 2 reasons. One, was because I was inspired by @campaignperiod showing me a video link and from that, I read up on the Hygiene Matters 2011 Report compiled by SCA. I realize I’m probably giving them free advertisement, but whatever… it was great having read this little report and yes, it IS little, only 43 pages and if you’ve read 300 page reports before, this is nothing, lol. I highly recommend those interested in personal well-being, whether male or female, to read it. If you are not interested in going through something that long (and it is NOT all about menstruation, it is about hygiene in general), please at least see this video.

The second reason was because as I was going through my MENinMenstruation YouTube account, I was “recommended” a video that caught my eye. Bebe once sent me a parody of how “strict” Malaysia TV broadcasting is when it comes to ‘revealing’ body parts. There are so many countries in the world and many cultures that have a particular view of menstruation, so you may wonder why I particularly selected that country and whether it had been influenced by bebe. In this case, it didn’t, because it showed up on my “suggested” videos to watch in which I read a very interesting quote:

6. Are there restrictions upon creative license in Malaysia?

Until very recently, sanitary napkins were not allowed to be shown on TV. Apart from that we could not show armpits or navels.

– Kancil Awards 2008 Chairperson Interview

I’m not interested in generating a debate over religion on my blog. As far as this entry is concerned, all people need to understand is that Malaysia’s official religion is Islam. According to Article 160 of the Malaysian Constitution, all ethnic Malays are considered Muslim, which approximately 60.4% of the Malaysian population practicing the Islam religion. Thus, you can see why broadcasting rules within Malaysia are so strict. I have a Muslim coworker and he is highly devoted and abides by the rules set forth by his religion closely. Although I knew about that showing of the armpits and navels on public TV in Malaysia violates broadcasting rules, I did not know that even sanitary napkin commercials were not allowed until I read the quote as stated above. For as long as I can remember, I always struggled in finding sanitary napkin commercials or even (Malaysian) manufacturer websites regarding sanitary napkins. All of this now makes sense as to why I had such difficulties!

Libresse Maxi Pads made by SCA. These are the same ones bebe gave me, but these are not mine and I did not take the picture!

Libresse Maxi Pads made by SCA. These are the same ones bebe gave me, but these are not mine and I did not take the picture!

Further digging revealed an article which was published fairly recently in October of 2010 by The Malaysian Insider author, Dina Zaman. There was a particular quote that almost made me choke on my coffee, not because I was disgusted by the thought of menstruation, but rather, how someone could have such a STARK view of menstruation…

“For example, commercials on sanitary pads are openly shown on TV and this could influence the young to get involved in social ills,” said Johor Bahru Puteri Umno member, urging the ministry to increase shows that teach good values and religious practices.

Umm.. excuse me, did I just read that seeing a commercial of sanitary pads would cause me to be involved in social ills? If that’s the case, I should have murdered a ton of people and raped many women by now according this member’s statement. Although I can’t say I’m the most normal of people in my interests such as menstruation, I’m definitely not socially dysfunction and I don’t pose harm to society or something. The likelihood is I’ve watch more sanitary pad commercials than probably all the females I know put together, so this member must hate my guts by now, lol. The author of the article then continues to write (regarding the above statement):

As a still menstruating woman, I have yet to witness how sanitary pads and their ads could lead one to sin. I have always thought that sanitary pads are a bane to women and frighten the hell out of men, especially bloody and wet ones.

The CMCF (The Communications and Multimedia Content Forum of Malaysia) under Part 3 section 8.6 of their broadcasting standard dictates..

8.6
Sanitary Protection Products and Incontinent Pads For Adults
Advertisements in this product category is unusually sensitive and commercials for it can easily cause offence or embarrassment, even among people who have no objection in principle to its being advertised on television. Because it is often viewed in a family setting, television advertising needs to be treated with restraint and discretion. Anyone intending to produce a commercial for a sanitary protection product and incontinent pads for adults MUST abide by the following:-
(a)
Restriction on Times of Transmission Commercials portraying a sanitary protection product and incontinent pads for adults are permissible only after 10.00pm.
(b)
Visual Treatments and Product Descriptions Sanitary protection products and incontinent pads for adults – visual treatments must be done with taste and restraint, particular care is needed with shots of unwrapped towels, pads or tampons, whether actual or diagrammatic. Detailed references, whether in sound or vision, should avoid graphic descriptions which might offend or embarrass viewers.
(c)
Appeals To Insecurity Sanitary protection products and incontinent pads for adults – no commercial may contain anything which, either directly or by its implication, is likely to undermine an individual’s confidence in her own standards of personal hygiene. No implication of, or appeal to, sexual or social insecurity is acceptable. Commercials may not suggest, by whatever means, that menstruation is in any way unclean or shameful and variations of the word “clean” are unacceptable in advertising for this product category, as are other potentially offensive words such as “odour”. The same applies to the advertising of incontinence.
(d)
Taste and Offence All advertisements for the category of sanitary napkins and incontinent pads for adults must not offend against good taste or decency or be offensive to public feeling and should not prejudice respect for human dignity.

So within that section, they state that they do not want commercials suggesting that menstruation is unclean or shameful (insinuating an attempt to be positive). However, from my perception of the above conditions of a commercial they want to avoid embarrassment, offensiveness and requires “restraint” that they’re being completely contradictory. They want you to avoid making menstruation or related products sound negative, yet they’re clearly NOT comfortable with the idea of advertising such products. Furthermore, I wanted to cry when I read that, “…portraying a sanitary protection product and incontinent pads for adults are permissible only after 10.00pm.” Wow.. after 10PM… that’s when all the kids “should” be asleep.. imagine if they ever stayed up past 10PM, their eyes and brains would be tainted forever should they be SO unfortunate as to seeing a commercial which depicts a menstrual or incontinent product. Their childhoods would be forever ruined and those kids will probably have premarital sex, fail at school and kill their parents as a result 🙄 If I ever had to deal with the broadcasting industry, even in Canada, I’d get so infuriated with this that I’d ask to borrow one of my girls used pad or tampon and just chuck it at the camera.

Clearly someone has the same taste of pads as I do :P

Clearly someone has the same taste of pads as I do 😛

Let’s move back into “North America” for a bit… you know, the free world where we have “freedom” of everything. In this land where drugs, sex and violence is shown freely on TV, and where I could probably get away with saying, “I’m going to fucking shit on your head and piss on your mother” – yet, if I were to say the word vagina, oh my god, I’m sure it’d be bleeped out for sure! This is not new news, so sure, bitch at me if I’m digging up older topics, but it linked into this one so whatever. You can read up on a UK news/blog author’s (Richard Adams) post on the whole U by Kotex thing when it started. The article writes:

An executive for Kimberly-Clark, the owner of Kotex, notes that US TV networks have no such compunction about references to “erectile dysfunction” in prime-time ads for Viagra and Ciallis.

You know, back in the day when I still had cable TV, I felt really uncomfortable when that 40 year-old guy came on the screen and was talking about the “issues” he had… essentially he can’t get it up or goes ‘limp’ when he has sex… and that it is a common problem and there should be no embarrassment to asking the doctor for help in getting Viagra prescribed. Umm.. I found that this was much harder (and grosser) to watch when my parents were around, than a maxi pad or a tampon commercials. Let’s face it, if erectile dysfunction should not be embarrassing and is a common issue, then how is MENSTRUATION of all things “unnatural” and “should cause embarrassment”? Menstruation, unlike erectile dysfunction, is a natural bodily process and the use of menstrual protection products to manage it is the hygienic and proper thing to do. Me knowing that you can’t get hard makes me more uncomfortable than if you were to tell me you were having your period. Hey, maybe it is just me and the fact I like periods that makes it feel more normal, but I really don’t want to know that you can’t pump enough blood to your dick to make it hard. Furthermore, it is also “frowned upon” (as in, they won’t even broadcast your ad) in a commercial to use the proper anatomical reference, vagina on prime-time TV. The last time I saw menstrual fluid, I’m pretty sure it wasn’t blue as well.

Menstruation is still a stigma

Menstruation is still a stigma (Found in the SCA Hygiene Matters Report)

Aren’t those statistics crazy? I have made a blog entry before about how sanitary napkins (because they are the more “conservative” choice over tampons, which you have to *gasp* stick something in your vagina) are still the preferred choice of menstrual protection in Asia regions before, but it was shocking to see how uncomfortable the subject of periods are still to Chinese women. Oddly enough, most of the Asian girls I happen to know are quite open with me on the subject, but I suppose that perhaps bebe is part of that 87% (even though she’s not “from China” per se, she is “Chinese”). The good thing is that even if she’s not open about her period to others, as long as she is to ME, I don’t give a shit 😆 But anyways, even if you look at the U.S (closest to Canada I guess), the statistics still show that HALF of the population still experience social discomforts when they have their period. Clearly, “America” is FAR from reversing the many years of menstrual taboo and the denouement of it. I remember in high school, I had a Swedish girl in my class (boy was she hot, lol) and I remember one time I spotted a tampon in her backpack and I gave it an extra glance. Clearly she caught me looking and during high-school, I was still rather shy about my interest, so I never talked about it… but then after class, she said if I was interested in seeing what a tampon looked like, she said, “Here, you can have my tampon if you want to know what one looks like.” and just put it in my hands, smiled and walked away. I was completely dumbfounded. I mean obviously this one Swedish girl doesn’t represent the entire culture of people, but I get the feeling there’s a lot more openness to menstruation from other cultures than from Chinese culture.

So the moral of this entire post? Feminine Hygiene Products and Your Vagina is Repulsive in the eyes of the broadcasting industry.

Please make sure you check out Period. (@campaignperiod) on twitter, their Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/SCA and oh… just as I was about to end this post, found something cool 😀

Innovative launch of Libresse Secure Fit in Malaysia

2011-03-07

INTERNATIONAL WOMEN’S DAY | 2010 the Libresse secure fit platform was launched in Malaysia. This is unique in many ways, not only because it is the first Asian market entry for The Libresse secure fit but also because it was decided to launch with a price line, which is completely new in the feminine category in Malaysia.

Libresse secure fit launch in Malaysia - SCAIt means that all products have the same price. A pack of ten thick towels has the same price tag as a pack with eight thin towels. However price is not the main differentiator. It is the performance and properties of the product that are differentiating Libresse secure fit from its competitors.

*NEW* Always Maxi LeakGuard Plus Pads with Odor Lock & U By Kotex Tween Ultra Thin Pad

Was reading up Kayo’s as usual and found two new pad-series posted up! Credit goes to college flowlover for the find. Looks like Always is trying to slowly seep into Tena and Poise market-share with incontinence products…. how Always will fare, we’ll find out soon enough!

Always Maxi LeakGuard Plus Pads with Odor Lock

Always Maxi LeakGuard Plus Pads - Long/Super without Wings, Scented

Always Maxi LeakGuard Plus Pads - Long/Super without Wings, Scented

Information quoted from Always.com:

Unlock the best-kept secret in protection — NEW Always Maxi LeakGuard™ PLUS Long Super with Odor Lock™. For an active life with a sensitive bladder, you need a pad that does more than just absorb. That’s why we’ve created reliable, discreet protection you can use without changing your lifestyle. It absorbs in seconds and neutralizes odors due to urine and menstruation for hours. Plus, the soft, top layer helps keep you comfortable, while body-hugging channels help protect you against sudden leaks.

and condensed information from the PGeStore:

Always Maxi LeakGuard Plus Odor Lock ABSORBS in seconds. NEUTRALIZES odors for hours.

  • The comfort and security you need to help you feel protected
  • Super soft cover
  • Helps eliminate and neutralize odors
  • Absorbs quickly to help protect you from leaks
  • It feels good to be so confident every day
  • Without Wings
  • Lightly Scented

Directions: To Use: Remove Pad from disposable wrapper, apply pad to underwear To Dispose: Remove Pad from underwear, wrap in disposable wrapper, throw in trash. Do not throw out Pad in toilet.

U By Kotex Tween Ultra Thin Pad

U By Kotex Tween Ultra Thin Pads

U By Kotex Tween Ultra Thin Pads

Information quoted from Kotex:

Product Features * Serious attitude. Serious protection for smaller sizes designed for a Tween * CleanWear cover for a clean and fresh feeling. MicroMax core locks in fluid fast. * Tru-fit wings help this baby stay put. * Folded and wrapped * Easy Open Wrapper in fun, bold colors. Product Description Product Description U by Kotex Tween Ultra Thin Pad w/Wings

Totally cool that there are finally some new pads hitting the market! Of course the UbK pads are just an extension of their existing pad line, but the new Always will be similar to the Envive by Always that they have in other parts of the world. I hope this will reach Canada soon since the above information were for the US only sadly 😦 However, it’ll only be a matter of time until it gets here (just like usual, we’re slow) and I’ll be monitoring pad-news and the store shelves closely 😀 If anyone has any Canadian information on this, please feel free to let me know!

Is Your Relationship Too Perfect & Having Standards vs. Being Picky

There's bebe and I in the future... LOL! Except.. I'm not as good-looking XD

There's bebe and I in the future... LOL! Except.. I'm not as good-looking XD

I really like these articles I find. I’m into self-improvement because I really want bebe to love me and find ways to be a more effective boyfriend and one day hopefully, husband. I think there’s no person too “perfect” to believe that they can always be better, while still being satisfied with themselves. Satisfaction, yet striving to improve are mutually independent things. One can be happy with who they are, yet continue to believe they have space to grow! “Beauty is in the imperfection“, I love it! 😀

Is Your Relationship Too Perfect?

By Sara Koonar (www.29secrets.com)
Why disputes and disagreements are a good thing

Is your relationship everything you’d dreamed of? Or is you idea of perfect not making you as happy as you thought it would? Arguments, challenges and set backs are what make us stronger and help us create a lasting bond. When you find Mr. Right and things are going smoothly, a little too smoothly, you have to wonder how you will grow as a couple if you have absolutely nothing to work on. Without those bumps in the road, our relationships become boring and unproductive. Building trust and falling in love means completely tearing down your walls and showing that person who you really are. No one is perfect, and if you are pretending to be something you are not, you simply can’t be yourself and you can’t be happy.

Anger is a Good Emotion
Constant disputes or never agreeing on anything can be a stress on most couples, but the occasional fight can help improve our communication skills and help us hash out our feelings. Keeping everything inside and putting on a fake smile is doing you and your partner a disservice. Being able to be open up about your feelings and opinions is what builds a strong partnership. Feeling comfortable enough to show your ugly cry or scream at the top of your lungs means you trust that person to love you at your lowest points.

Love is Blind
If you feel you need to act, dress or look a certain way that is opposite to who you are in order to make your partner happy, you should take a look at the sacrifices you are making and consider whether or not they are worth it. The greatest part of a relationship is being able to be yourself and know that you are loved. Wanting to be beautiful for someone is one thing, but completely changing to fit into someone else’s ideals is not okay. Stand up for yourself and let your partner know that you like who you are and they should too.

Beauty is in the Imperfections
If you can laugh at his loud snoring that keeps you up all night or tease him about his not-so-suave dance moves, loving your partners “imperfections” is what a great relationship is all about. Knowing what makes each other tick or finding out his deepest and darkest secrets is what makes your bond special. Having that connection with him is priceless and more perfect than a relationship that is based on shutting up and smiling through it.

I wonder if my bebe has “standards” or is “too picky” XD I guess I’ll have to find out the hard way 😆

Having Standards vs. Being Picky

By Nora McInerny (www.29secrets.com)
How to tell the difference

You know that it’s better to be single than to compromise your standards. Your coupled friends, your mother and your gynecologist insist that you’re being a little too picky. So who’s right?

Standard:
Having a type. If you know that you’re a preppy princess, then you can feel free to weed out the skinny hipsters from your banker boy dating pool.

Being Picky:
Okay, so you like your guys clean cut. But is it necessary for any man you date to wear exclusively Brooks Brothers, part his hair on the side, have a perfectly hairless chest, drive a Saab and own a vacation cottage? When you’re looking for one specific person, you’re going to miss out on a whole lot of quality humans.

Standard:
A gainfully employed gentleman who takes pride in his career. There’s nothing wrong with wanting someone who is interesting in building a secure and comfortable future with you.

Being picky:
Wanting a dude with a career you’re specifically interested in bragging to your friends about. Not all the good guys end up being doctors or rocket scientists, and who knows? If you expand your horizons beyond the astronaut you’ve always dreamed about, you just may meet the insurance actuary who will sweep you off your feet.

Standard:
Someone who has common interests. Life is more fun when you have someone to share the things you love!

Being picky:
Someone who has everything in common with you. You’re wonderful, but you don’t need a carbon copy of yourself. Breaking up with a dude who doesn’t share your list of desert island movies or whose iTunes Most Played list makes you cringe is going a step – or six – too far.

Sometimes these articles are nice, because it gives ideas from angles that I would never see. Men and women are distinctly different in how they think and perceive things… and I mean it could be said since we’re all “individuals” – but men and women often have attributes that are “like” their ‘own kind’ (as in male/female). I laugh whenever I ask my girl-friends things about bebe or how women perceive things and they often all have a resounding similar answers to each other, while when I ask my guy-friends, they often all reply with thoughts similar to mine 😀 I don’t try to make an analysis out of everything, but it is almost amusing to see how sometimes our brains all walk on the same line 😆 Something that makes it harder is that bebe doesn’t think like the “typical girl” all that time, so I end up not always being able to rely on my girls for “girl-like” advice XD HAH!

Credit Card Shock

Ok… so really, I’m not that shocked about my current credit card balance (and only ONE of them too, LOL), because I’m quite aware of my spending. If you have been paying attention to the blog, you’ll also know I’ve been trying to actually “utilize” my money and actually spend more of it to entertain and/or generate some monetary happiness, so it wasn’t like I “wasn’t expecting” to see these numbers. It is shocking only because I rarely see it this high 😆 .. and plus, I needed a catchy topic title, harhar.

I was going through my list of like 20 some-odd transactions, trying to figure out how much of it was pleasure-related and trying to separate it from business-related payments, since I also run purchases for my own company through this particular card. Looks like this month, I’ve spent quite a bit for ‘personal’ use and the numbers are starting to rack up. Just this weekend alone I spent quite a bit of money, particularly on food, haha! You know those weekends that you just go out and spend money like crazy? This was one of them. You’ll feel the pain a month down the road when the bills come flying in, lol.

And if you think these numbers actually included my plane ticket or spending in
Hong Kong, I’ll have you know those amounts were cleared a long time ago and all this spending contributing to the following picture is all from the past month since I’ve returned to Canada. I suppose I should really bend over now, lube up my ass and just wait until the next credit card statement lands on my desk.

Current owing amount and the billing period isn’t even over yet…

My ass hurts... $$$

My ass hurts... $$$

And so I proceeded to read an article which made me laugh because I realized why I spent more this year (other than my changes in spending habits) than any other during this-time-of-the-year…

Valentine’s can be considered an economic stimulus that helps to boost sales in between Christmas and Easter. According to Reuters News Agency, for Valentine’s Day 2011, the average American couple will spend $189, which is three times more than what singles generally spend on an average date ($67).

Man.. people go on expensive dates, LOL.. actually, I never calculated how much I spend taking bebe out. Come to think of it, I might actually spend more than that in a day with her 😐 Eep! There’s a good reason why bebe and I don’t go out every night, I’d be poor afterward XD

According to estimates from the National Retail Foundation, the average person will spend $116.21 on Valentine’s Day merchandise this year, this figure is up almost 13% percent over last year’s $103.00. Overall, this will bring total Valentine’s Day spending to about $15.7 billion.

 

Some people barely have money to eat, and here we are spending over $100 on gifts… ick.

The survey also found that overall spending is expected to be up this year. Consumers will fork over $3.5 billion on jewelry this Valentine’s Day, up from 2010’s estimated $3 billion.

Woooo, I’m part of the statistic this year! LOL.. I’m contributing to that 3.5 billion, haha.

No changes are expected on who will spend more; men will spend the most on Valentine’s Day gifts. The average man is anticipated to spend $158.71, more than double what the average woman will spend.

 

That’s bullshit 😛 Why do us guys have to pay more? 😆 I thought men and women were supposed to be equal in societal standards now, haha.

According to Reuters, young professionals plan to spend $255 for Valentine’s with their significant other.

Hrm… how to define young professionals?

I was just talking to one of the girls at work today and she pretty much said as well Valentine’s Day is really a waste of money – or rather – if you’re going to buy gifts or do sweet things for your partner, that can be done any time, rather than on a “specific day”… and yes, while I agree with that, it’s also nice to mark a special occasion like this. However, give it a few more years and when bebe and I get married, v-day may not really be all that special 😀 HAHA!

I think it’ll be very quick that the next time I check my credit card tally that it’s going to be pushed over the 3,000 mark.. ooohh boy. Looks like I’ll be eating Mr. Noodles for a while 😛

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