Fridays are always interesting at work, because everyone becomes really complacent and laid-back. Half the staff are usually gone for 1PM, lol. I walked around today after my lunch, looking for one of the other project managers to talk to about some upcoming things we’ll be handling and his office was already dark with the door closed, lol. I headed back to my office to work on some leisure stuff since there was no much to do. Work was minimal, although I did have to photocopy 3600 pieces of paper today… and yes, it is completely wasteful, so much for our “paperless” environment! What I printed off was a powerpoint, could you imagine? Wasn’t the whole point of using powerpoints to provide a method of digital visualization or presentation format? Every person in the room will have access to a computer and their email, so if we mass-mailed the powerpoint out, there would be no need to waste paper like this. There are going to be 200 or so participants, so given how many slides I have in my presentation, that’s probably a couple of trees that we just killed.
Funny things happen on Fridays, I think people become whacked-out or too excited about the weekend. I have to say, even though this week has only been 4 working-days, it feels ass long. I have to agree I find myself being a lot more relaxed and casual on Fridays… but some people are too casual… not in the way they dress, but I think their mind becomes mush or something on Fridays. As I was walking down the hall, there were some groups standing along the edges talking, which is fine, since they’re not in the way. For some reason as I was mid-way down the hall walking past a conversation (and I have NO idea what they were talking about which prompted them), one of the guys asked me non-nonchalantly, “Hey [my name], I was just wondering, do you shave your balls?” That’s the oddest question someone has asked me before… and given the environment, at work, in public, like really? Even my girlfriends have never asked that before and “WTF” was my thought, lol. As a guy, I really don’t want to know whether another guy shaves his nuts or not, lol – what concern is it of mine? Do I plan on going near it? NO. So that’s highlight number 1 of my day 😆
Highlight number 2 was the fact Ontario is experiencing some crazy temperatures. A few days ago, it was hot enough that I had the windows opened all night and even began to tone-down the heat. We set the house thermostat at 12 degrees so that the outside temperature wouldn’t trip our heater to come on and waste all the heat going out the window. I had even brought a few of the fans up from the basement just in case we need some circulation pre-air-conditioning season. The past 2 days, the temperatures decreased dramatically again and at work today, there was even an hour of flurries! Luckily it did not snow hard enough where it began to cover the roads, but traffic was slow. When I got home, realizing that the thermostat was still on 12, the house was COLD. For those who know me, I can stand the cold very well, I’m the one who will be still wearing shorts and a t-shirt when everyone has their jackets on. However, given an enclosed environment such as my house, coldness is like being in a walk-in freezer, it is trapped air which continues to circulate around. At around 4PM, I decided it was just a bit too cold in the house and turned the thermostat back up to 17 degrees Celsius (which is still below-normal temperatures for most people, but we’re just used to it).
I realized the house was beyond cold in the most amusing manner. I felt my bladder getting full, I had to pee. Yes, I knew I had to pee and I walked to the washroom. Do you know how guys can tell that they’re cold? That’s right, I had problems getting it out because it decided to go back into its “hiding spot” because of how cold it was! It took me a while to warm myself before it came out of its shell to go pee. Next time your boyfriend is cold or just comes out of the pool, ask to see his penis, I’m sure you won’t find it very impressive, LOL. This came to light because one of my friend, D, recently came back from Alberta where he worked in at the oil rigs out there. It was great money, but amazingly cold conditions. Any exposed skin could render it frost-bitten within minutes. What we experience in the more “urban” provinces is nothing compared to what he went through. I remember him telling us his experience out there. The workers (generally guys) would huddle around and go pee with each other. Why? Not because they were gay, but because that’s the only way you can stay WARM while trying to pee. He jokingly (yet in all truth) said that, “No matter how well-endowed you are, 8″, 9″ or even 10″ cock, in that kind of weather, you’re lucky if it’s even 2″ and trying to get it out to pee is near impossible. If you can manage to get it out to pee, no one will even laugh at the size because everyone else’s is like that too!” and we all laughed. Today, that is when I realized my house was too cold, I had to find my own penis to piss, lol. Suffice to say, I’m not black so I don’t have a 10″ cock, but I certainly do not under NORMAL conditions need to look for it 😆 HAHAHA – what a day.
Having found some hidden spots on my car where the paint is peeling a bit, I started thinking about buying a car after another 2-3 years. Of course I know if I really wanted to, I could hold on for this car for quite a while because of its great conditions, but I like to have a new car every 5 years – it’s nice not to be driving the same one for too long. Nevertheless, don’t think I’m not loyal or anything… we’ve had two family-cars before, both Honda’s and the first one lasted 13 years and the second one lasted 7 (because I sold it, what am I going to do with two cars?). With this new car, I’ve already used it for a solid 3 years, so if I give it another few years, 6-7 year-old car is about time to be replaced. I love my cars a lot, but not to the degree of a typical guy. I don’t spend a fortune maintaining it or adding “cool things” (but I follow regular maintenance schedules), I don’t do rust-coatings or get my car spray-painted every year and I don’t wash my car everyday until it is spotless. I’m a regular vehicle owner. I do get attached to my cars however, and dearly miss them when they depart from me!
I have been spotting two models of vehicles for my next one, although I have yet to decide what works for me. Also, I have to consider that it is possible in the future, that there might be a ‘growth’ in occupants (e.g. hopefully marriage, kids?), so I must make sure my purchase takes that into consideration. I have considered buying a smaller vehicle, but that really depends on how my love life (LOL – yes, funny) works out. Also, with the way hybrids are slowly matching the prices of regular gas-vehicles, I’m also looking at that as a potential.
I’ve never driven a hybrid except for the one time my driving-instructor took me out in his. In terms of fuel economy, proper use of the hybrid-nature will definitely help slash the costs on fuel. I haven’t been doing a lot of city-driving lately, but if things begin to turn around and I end up visiting my bebe more, there’ll definitely be a need for a city-efficient car as getting to her house is 100% city-driving. It feels like ages since I’ve been over to her house >.> but I have to step-back and understand that she’s under a lot of pressure to handle her school-matters first! It is annoying she has time for her friends, but not me, but I’ve only complained about that 502942390 times by now haven’t I? Yes, jealousy and anger, never a good mix, RE: my post yesterday, lol. I’m going to take a DEEP breathe before I continue.
The ES350 is a larger version of my existing ES300… given that this one would also be a newer version of it, I will no longer have to worry about buying a new GPS every few years as most new cars have them built-in. Also, a lot of cars have voice-control as well for GPS and phone-handling. It’s nice not to have to pair my phone with my GPS every time I get in the car now as the in-dash bluetooth should kick in once I get within range of the vehicle. Seating is comfortable and there is sufficient rear-seating and trunk space. I always like to “future proof” my cars, rather than have to worry about buying a bigger vehicle later. It seems rather stupid, but things occur rapidly in life and you don’t want any more stress than you’ll already have!
On happy news, I’ve went down from needing to wear LARGE clothing to MEDIUM now – wow, it has been a long time since I’ve been able to do that. Although I’m not visibly thinner (some people have noticed, just not the majority), I am making progress. My stomach however, to me, has been visibly cut-back and I’m starting to feel the abs perking up from underneath. All those intense cardio sessions and abdominal-workouts have really paid off. I’m still not as slim as I’d like to be, but everything starts with the first step! In a way, I think we as love-stricken humans do stupid things, like trying to modify our body to win someone’s love. Ya, humans are stupid, lol, in most cases, we always do something “on behalf of someone” not because we should be doing it on “behalf of ourselves”. I should be healthy and slim, regardless of whether I am pursuing a girl or not, rather than ‘doing it for her’… but I suppose, any type of incentive that’ll get me going is good enough! This has been the first time I’ve ever stuck to a plan for this long when it comes to weight maintenance. I usually just slack off after a while. When the weather gets better, I’d like to begin doing some running too! My coworker is currently doing 15 (yes, FIFTEEN) kilometers every day, that’s nuts! Of course, he used to work in the military, but the fact that he’s almost 50 and still in great shape – that’s something I want to look forward to!
Last night, I had a weird dream. The dream involved both my ex-ex girlfriend and my bebe… wtf, why the hell are they both in the same dream? LOL… that’s quite weird. It’s not unusual for me to have dreams of my bebe, but why my ex-ex I haven’t seen her for quite a while, so how she appeared in there, I have no idea, haha. In the morning, I woke up as if I never slept and still felt tired. Weird, I’m usually quite energized in the morning because I’m one of those regular 8-hour sleepers. I even slept-in an extra hour since there was no morning-meeting today as per usual. Probably makes sense though, my mind at night had to deal with TWO (2) women in my dreams, that’s frigging exhausting, lol. The other day I posted this article on my Facebook about how this lucky guy managed to get twins to marry him. One of my friends, Elsa, mentioned that what guy would ever want two wives, there’d be so much bitching your head would explode. Funny how I felt tired when I woke up… my ex-ex and my bebe all in a single dream? Ya, my mind probably imploded on itself – two women even in a dream world managed to make me restless 😆
So anyways, there’s my Friday in a nutshell. I’m sure you’re not overly excited about this. I’m going to go brush my teeth now, stretch on my bed and go watch some TVB series 😀 Toodles!
The other day, I was musing over the stark contrast over the two sides of my family. On one side, I can return home and be treated like a king. I can have my slippers at my bedside, breakfast brought to me, someone to wash my face when I get up, not wash my own clothing, can order foot anytime I want and even if I really wanted to have my ass wiped for me after taking a crap. However, looking on the other side of my family, it is a major contrast… where my aunt at is working for just enough money for flat-rental and enough to cover for food. At the end of the month, savings = $0 unless it is a lucky month or they picked up some weekly sales. Their lifestyle is unhealthy, often eating fast-foods because it is cheap and easy. I saw my aunt last year when I went to visit her and boy did she ever gain weight. After my grandmother passed away a few years, there were no longer good healthy meals or broth to drink. Almost everyone in that household gained weight from poor eating habits and stress. One side is living in subsidized government housing and the other half is living in multi-…. well nevermind, you get the idea.
A few months ago, we were told my Grandfather (maternal) had been diagnosed with intestinal cancer and some other small illnesses. Given that he will be turning 90 this year, he honestly couldn’t care less and didn’t worry too much about it. He felt he lived his life, but of course my aunts would want to seek medical assistance for him. After several months of tests, surgeries, and days in the hospital, I am happy to say he’s about to return home healthy! However, because private hospitals were the only chance of him surviving, it also meant my aunt had to pay for all the medical expenses. Given my aunt normally makes just enough to cover for rental and food, she had to do major modification to finances just to make ends meet. I thought to myself the other day how brave and selfless she is and it moved me. Of course not only that, but also since he is my grandfather, the little bit I could do for him (since they’re 13,000 km’s away) is to provide some financial assistance. The money was to be sent in the form of an encouragement for him to stay strong and healthy and to give him food to buy some good food/herbs to strengthen his body and whatever left to be a “treat” to spend on whatever he likes. I sent him a few thousand dollars which to me, I could say is a lot or a little. To my dad’s side however, the minuscule amount of money I sent would be a joke, however, my mom called my aunt the other day and she was so thankful as she’d now be able to cover the hospital fees for quite a while (backdated).
I started thinking how “little” something could be to someone but “how much” something could be to another. I am not very rich myself (family is another thing) and all the money I could shell out was sent, what I hardly considered a fortune, but them, it was like I just sent them a winning lottery ticket. What I can say though is the amount of happiness I felt when she sent her words of gratitude just took my breath away. Although I recognize that sending money is not really the best way to show care for my grandfather, it is all I can do for now until I return to Hong Kong later this year. I also told me mom that we’d hold a “big 90th birthday” celebration for him – because surely, it is not everyday that families are able to celebrate a 90th birthday together. To think of how little my mom’s side can live on while looking at the way my dad’s side spends money and the wealth we’re submerged in really makes makes my head spin! I think about some of the meals we eat and realize the money we spent could likely be an entire family’s monthly meal on my mom’s side. Oh, how life is unfair sometimes.
Today I was called on an emergency by one of my uncles to help one of his nieces. We’re “relatives” so technically, the girl I was helping isn’t really a cousin – but certainly, in Chinese culture I would definitely consider her “one of my own” – especially because we did spend time together as kids when they lived in Canada. Nevertheless, I felt very happy today because of the gratitude she showed. She insisted on paying me for my services to help her fix her computer (well and I had to travel about 100 km’s) but she did treat me to lunch. I should mention it isn’t one of those “cheapie” Japanese restaurants, it was a nice upscale REAL Japanese restaurant… not all-you-can-eat, but the ones that cost an arm and a leg for each item, lol. Whenever I eat out with people, I still look for the “worth” of an item and do not order frivolously just because I’m not paying. She found it awkward I ate only a sashimi bento. Nevertheless, the sashimi was amazing and seriously, I think I’m addicted to it, hahaha. But anyways,back to the point was that coming from a rich family, she ordered food likes nuts (even though she couldn’t finish it) and chose an expensive place to eat, where as I, would’ve chosen a more modest place!
I think today, we were both very happy. She showed so much gratitude and appreciation and kept on thanking me throughout the day for helping her with her computer problems. Although it was a pretty expensive drive to her place and effectively killed the time I had off today, I felt a huge sense of accomplishment. Although I am not a doctor keeping people alive everyday or in a very prestigious job, I feel overly excited when people take the time to show genuine appreciation. I am turning older in a few days and that’s gotten me very down… but the past few days of doing “good deeds” have really lifted up my spirits. I truly want to believe that building good karma will help me along life, staying happy, mentally healthy and help develop my love-life. Does being a good person really result in good fortunes happening? Well, we’ll find out to see if I can really move the girl of my dreams one day… someday soon hopefully!
Good night everyone, hope today was as good for everyone as it was for me! Better yet, I have tomorrow off, so time to sleep in!
Tonight, I heard this new song by Hedly called Perfect. In this one line where they keep repeating: “I’m not perfect, but I keep trying, cuz that’s what I said I would do from the start…,” it gave me the chills.
I miss my parents, I have no idea what I’ve been doing lately. I’m anxiously waiting for my results from MBiotech and ever since my interview I’ve been praying for this spot. I feel so helpless… 2 years of preparation and I blew one of the parts of the interview, how can I afford to slip like that. I really hope they can see past it. Preparing for this made me want this even more that I can’t imagine doing anything else. Waiting to graduate, waiting for results, waiting for the next step for me…. I need the extra bit of motivation to push me through the finish line.
I feel like I’m not doing the right things, I feel like I’m making bad decisions again. How can I stop feeling this way?
I don’t have any summer plans.. I can’t even ask my supervisor about research in the summer because what if I get in? But if I don’t and I don’t let her know that I want to work as a summer student again, I will loose the chance.. I’m really lost… I don’t have any backups…. when this program is what you wanna do, how can you write another personal letter for another program? So I’ve been holding back on writing other apps. Why am I pushing myself into this hole… I know I should be doing better right now. I just can’t find the motivation to make a strong finish. I wish someone could tell me what to do…. what happens when I don’t get into the program, what’s my next step?
I’m not a perfect student, I’m not a perfect person, but I strive for perfection. What happens when perfection just doesn’t fall through in the end? It’s up to the admissions committee to decide who they want to accept, argh 32 spots… I want it so bad. I’ve been dreaming of that one day, when I can work in GSK… or Genentech and family will seem complete again.
Tonight was my chemistry exam, I knew it was going to be hard. I gave up alot of things to prepare for this exam and I feel disappointed in myself. I knew everything but during the test, I don’t know why, the things I memorized just couldn’t come out. I guess I wasn’t as prepared as I thought and maybe I just crammed way too many reagents in my head.
Whenever people say, maybe some things are just meant to be.. I don’t know if I believe in that. I’m not sure if there is a thing called fate or destiny. I now believe that it is up in our hands to create our own destiny. A person who believes in fate, who just sits there and wait… it all seems too idealistic. All the way through I had to figure alot of things out on my own… I just think if I just let things take its course, I wouldn’t be standing close to where I am now. But at the same time, I can’t help but feel that there’s also up to a certain point where it’s also up to fate, like right now with my admission decision. So, is all the work up to now really even worth it when in the end, when it’s still out of your hands? Just something to think about for people who read this and were in a similar situation.
I’m feeling like a failure right now. Unlike others, this isn’t an option for me because of the circumstances I’m in. I wish I could explain but it’s just way too complicated.
I wish I could drive…. I was thinking if I got a license here, just to get out of city for a bit…. go somewhere far away from the lights and the people. Nobody seems to understand what it does for me. Like being somewhere close to the lake or the waters, is what I need to regain my energy, I don’t know how to explain it, it’s just what I used to do and it works. Yesterday night, I was laying in bed thinking about the days I used to go to driving range…. an activity that can get my mind off of school for a while. Or playing the piano. I used to do that…All the things that I used to do to relax me seem so far away and out of reach.
RE: The above entry
Ah, how I love watching little kids grow up… 🙂 You’re such a big girl now! Nevertheless, one always wants to strive for their best and to reach for their achievements, but perfection is not we should seek. We definitely should seek satisfaction but not through the believe we are perfect individuals with an absolute and irrefutable goal. To seek perfection in anything you do is like trying to grab at sand really hard – it is futile.
To feel homesick or simply missing family and friends who you have grown up with is not an unusual feeling. During times of our greatest need is when we feel most vulnerable and know that we can only rely on our family as back-up. No matter how great friends are and the joys of happiness they may bring, family is the only true source of unparalleled love and unconditional support. The interviewers do not expect perfection, they expect a human being, they expect a person capable of learning, they expect a person who’s mistakes are reflected and learned upon – they are not looking for someone who is perfect. We are all human and unless they are that of a holy spirit who are perfect themselves, they can bring no such expectations upon others. The motivation you bring, is stronger than mistakes and that willpower can be served elsewhere, regardless of whether you make it into a specific company or not. Where there is a will, there is a way – and that way might be or might not be where you think life may take you. Motivation cannot be generated by others, it is something that comes from within you. I could tell you all day to believe in yourself, but alas, if you do not believe in it yourself, no amount of confidence from others can help push you through.
A decision is a decision, with the ideal of “right” or “wrong” emplaced by our own standards. If you believe the decisions you have made are wrong – then they are wrong. If you believe decisions you have made are right, no one else can convince you they are wrong. Trusting our own judgments, believe in ourselves and knowing that no one decision leads to a final end will help you come to terms with decisions you make. For every step you take forward, you can take one step back – even if step-back is not in the exact same position you once stood. When things are conditional upon others, there is nothing we can do. In this world, there is only one-true thing we can control, and that is ourselves. To question things beyond our control is like questioning the meaning of life. Things will fall into or out-of-place whether we like it or not, so we should just let life run its course. On that note, to worry about whether you will or will not make it in and whether it would be necessary to reapply to the research program is unnecessary. I believe it is best to simply leave your options open and be honest with people. If you let them know of the situation, they’re more likely to sympathize and act out of humanly towards a situation. It is always best to be honest, than to leave someone blind. Rather than being definitive, simply inform people of the plans and possibilities, that way, they are more open to changes that may occur in the future.
There are many things we want in life, as humans, we crave for more and that craving is what allows society to progress. There is great strength you have for wanting to work at a place you feel comfortable and where you feel you are accomplishing the most. However, when we set goals like that,we never take time to look past at other opportunities that may be right in our faces or perhaps, worthy of consideration. You never know where life takes you, it may lead to where you want to go or it may lead you to where you never thought was once possible. Rather than expecting, simply believe, or better yet – being neither pessimistic nor optimistic but rather, a job is never the start, nor end of a career as many things will change as time progresses. What you may be doing today may not be what you’re doing tomorrow – for better, or for worse.
There is no “trick” to doing well on exams, and the only thing that a person can really do to prepare is with a semester-wide commitment to regular studying habits. Last minute studies rarely work out, things absorb so much better when done over time. Also, your mind works clearly when your body is in optimal condition and all that starts with one thing, a good night’s rest. The more you stick in your head the night before, the more likely you will confuse your brain with other things that have been long-term embedded and learned. All of a sudden, all that information you did know has now been mixed in with information which you have only recently processed. I think the word “cramming” already has implications on itself – the act of “cramming” already has a negative connotation.
Fate and destiny are very hard subjects to approach. However, something that is undeniable is that there are things that we as an individual, simply cannot change. Whether you consider this an act of fate or destiny is up to you. While it is quite true that sitting around “waiting” for fate or destiny to act upon itself is idealistic, there truly happen just by, “being in the right place at the right time.” There are times when hard work and effort are fruitless and where negativity and lack of effort yields amazing results. Our destiny and fate are often not controlled by us, but really, in the hands of all the environment and people around us. What we cannot see and touch – it is best to be blind to, we are an observer at all things in life.
Take advantage of the fact you life in an accessible region, where renting/buying a vehicle is easy. Pick up your license, you will need it! If not, find a way of taking transportation to get you where you want to go. There is salvation in humanity and “heaven” is only a step away when we allow ourselves to relax and enjoy our surroundings. Hell is the place we suffer and feel tormented by the stresses of life and worries beyond our control. Whatever you can do to make yourself feel better, do it. Put away responsibilities and obligations for the day, they can wait. You on the other hand, always place your own priorities first. If you are not feeling happy, nothing you do will seem right. When you are feeling happy, nothing you do can feel wrong. You are surrounded by little towns to big cities, I’m sure there are plenty of places that will offer you what you need to release all that tension within you. We are like an elastic band, stretch it too much and there is only one consequence that you will be the one who ends up suffering. With good maintenance and knowing when the expand and contract, the elastic band will serve you a lifetime of usefulness.
I promised I’d write this for Poh Ching a long time ago and it’s finally time I live up to this! In this entry, I’d like to take some time to discuss ways to make your girlfriend or wife feel better shortly before or during her period. Let’s face it, most men rather avoid a woman while she is menstruating and that is too bad, because we should not ditch our second half just because she’s bleeding between her legs. Some men are opposed to my way of thinking, “being there for the girl” and rather, feel that they are more of a help if they just stay out of the way. Everyone is entitled to their own opinions and every girl is different on how she wants to be treated or what makes her feel good. However, this entry will cover some things I feel might be ways you can help comfort your partner. There is no “definitive” way to make her feel good and I can’t say this will work for every girl, but these are things for guys (or girls) to consider. Remember that your commitment to your girlfriend or wife should be just-cause not to feel that you don’t need to be a part of her life every week of a month.
I recently typed up an answer for Yahoo! Answers to any inquiry from a male about what he can say/do for his girlfriend while she is on her period and here’s my reply. It was chosen as the “Best Answer” so I decided it’d be good enough to be reposted:
Best Answer – Chosen by Voters
Really, words mean nothing at a time like that. Also, saying sorry is like something you say at a funeral or something. You shouldn’t be sorry or feel sorry for her that she’s having her period, it is a normal bodily function. Sorry also implies negativity towards periods and it should be necessary that men and women do not view menstruation as some kind of “bad” thing. Take some time to understand her period from both an anecdotal (from her experience) and educational point of view, use books, magazines, articles, online, etc. to find information pertaining to her body and menstruation.
You can’t make the pain she’s going through better, since it is her body, but you can do things that will make her as comfortable as she can be. If she has cravings, let her have it, there’s nothing worse than resisting a craving because all that does is cause crankiness. If there’s something she asks you to do and it’s reasonable, try to accommodate her. A massage, warm bath and just being there for her will do more for her than anything you can say – because actions are what matters. If she’s still capable of going about, take her to do an activity which removes her attention away from her period/pain. While initially she might feel that the pain is disabling her from concentrating on the activity, show enthusiasm, get her into it so she’s not constantly thinking about the pain. I cannot say that this will remove the pain, but it makes no difference whether she’s crunched up and feeling the pain or whether she’s doing something and still feeling it.
Actively helping her out in things she would normally do would help take the stress of her “thinking about her responsibilities”.. if there’s things that need to be done around the house, do it. Your sole goal is to make her feel as relaxed as possible because stress will compound the pain she feels. Helping her feel at-ease will provide a form of stress-relief which will relax muscle tension and potentially reduce the pain (or at least not make it worse).
Let her fall asleep in your arms, skin-to-skin contact with someone she cares about is an excellent psychological relief. Just be remember that you have to be understanding and sometimes be willing to bite your tongue. It doesn’t mean you should AVOID her, but menstruation is very taxing on the body, mind and is triggered by flares of hormones. It is possible she might be more sensitive to things you say or do, especially things that would not normally trigger negative emotions.
If you two are ready to engage in sexual activities, I should suggest to you that one of the best natural pain-relievers for cramps or otherwise painful periods is an orgasm. You can either allow her to do that on her own, or do it for her. She might be resistant to it, but mind you she will be glad afterward because many girls report that an orgasm or sexual stimulation helps alleviate their cramps.
Lucky for you, part of the site I run is “menstruation basics for men” – something that you might be particularly interested in if you are not sure what you can do for your girlfriend while she is on her period. It is menstruation simplified for guys (without gory details) but gives you a good understanding of what menstruation is about. There are also helpful tips on what YOU can do as a boyfriend with contributions from myself, other authors and female posters.
Here’s the most important thing you can say to her, “How can I help you?” … only she will know what you can do to make her feel best!
Beyond that, here are some thoughts about what you can do to make the best of her period:
- Be informed! You’re a much better boyfriend or husband when you understand what she’s going through
- Participate in physical activities with her as exercise tends to reduce cramping or period-pains. Exercise is not something that’s important only when she’s on her period, but also regularly, as moderate exercise throughout the month will help regulate her menstrual cycle and side-effects.
- Avoid expressing your discomfort, grossness or negativity towards menstruation and brush her off. You’re together because you’re supposed to be together for better or worse, not only when you see fit
- Help her pick up her pads and tampons from the store, especially if she’s not capable of doing it herself (Read Feminine Hygiene Basics, Maxi Pad Basics for Men and Tampon Basics for Men)… please get the rights ones so you won’t piss her off even more
- Don’t be greedy, if she needs a “girl’s night out” let her do so and encourage her to enjoy herself!
- Don’t point out the fact that she’s being moody or irritated, you really think she doesn’t know that?
- Steer away from causing more stress than she already has… avoid any “surprizes” or asking for her judgment for any large-scale questions or decisions (When her mind is more clear and her hormones aren’t speaking on her behalf, more rationale decisions can be made)
- Let her indulge, she’s not going to gain 10lbs overnight just because she ate an extra chocolate bar… attempting to act against her cravings is like kicking yourself in the nuts. Even if she’s on a diet or the food is “not the greatest for her” – if it comforts her, you’ve won half the battle, LET HER HAVE IT
- Keep your guy-friends away from her, guys tend to be a bit potty-mouthed when it comes to being sensitive to a girl’s time of the month, so unless you have well-behaved male friends, avoid exposure to social interaction between them and your girl
- Make her a nice warm bath or give her a heating-pad for her pelvic-area as that’ll alleviate the effects of stomach cramps. I remember a not-so-smart guy decided to use a plastic water bottle with hot water poured in it as a replacement… not a good idea. Don’t stick around, let her enjoy the peace and quiet and not feel obligated to you
- Do anything that’ll soften her heart… tell her she’s beautiful (because she is), tell her you love her (because you do) and anything that’ll melt them to little-itsy-pieces
- Lots of girls are hornier during her period – set the mood for her and if she’s willing, you’re in luck
- Although this is not necessarily related to comforting her, remember that it does not mean a girl can not get pregnant during her period
- Give her a lower-back or lower-abdominal massage
- If her conditions require pain-killers, make sure you have them available and offer it to her as necessary
- Take part in her menstrual cycle, talk to her about concerns you may have if you see menstruation being unbearable for her to encourage her to consult a medical professional
- Be aware that sometimes she will do things out of the ordinary because of hormonal fluctuations and don’t take it personally, resist the urge to fight back
- Get her to open-up if you can about her period. It is embedded in most girls that periods should be a hidden thing and an often uncomfortable discussion with men. Getting her to open-up about her period will help you understand what you can do for her and perhaps make her feel more at-ease when she’s on her period around you
- Help her keep track of her period, which might also be in your interest to know when she’s getting close and about to start. If you keep good track, your records might be even better than hers
- In regards to the above point, her period is still her private matter if she talks to you about it. Don’t talk to her friends/family about it unless you know she is comfortable and willing. She trusts you with that information, therefore it is inadvisable to alert others of it
- If she doesn’t want you near her during that time, buy her sex toys or something that allows her to enjoy herself, privately – orgasms relieve cramps, this is scientifically proven
- Fulfill her daily tasks because she probably isn’t up to them… it isn’t going to kill you to do things around the house
- Don’t be flirty, teasing or a pervert – unless she wants you to be – around her during her period, she’s not in the mood to listen to you talk about how hot one of her girlfriends look
I remember having a lot more points than this, but I always forget to jot them down as they come to mind. I’ll add to this as the opportunity presents itself! Here’s your chance to show your girlfriend or wife you really care about her, including menstruation. There’s no excuse to avoid her like the plague, 365 days a year, she’s your girlfriend or wife!
Just to finish it off, found an amusing FML today:
Today, I finally felt ready to take my bra off during sex. My breasts had “deflated” somewhat due to weight loss and I was really self-conscious about them, but my boyfriend insisted I was hot no matter what. When the bra came off, the dick got soft. FML#8793926 (95) On 03/03/2010 at 4:24am
It’s happy days like these I wish I could re-live over and over again. This morning, I went to the temple with a couple of friends who really really wanted to try their vegetarian meal there. Although they were strictly Catholic, they did not mind the idea of “eating at a temple” or even being in the presence of a Buddhist atmosphere. I’m not sure how that’d be looked upon, but I know my uncle/aunt who are strict Catholic won’t even STEP FOOT in a temple, near one or anything related to it. We got there around 11:30, just half an hour shy of the start of lunch so we showed them around, the library, miniature tea house, gift shop, etc. until it was time. Since the 1/2 hour did not provide us with a lot of time, we had to go back after. For those who don’t follow my blog or the (lack thereof) interesting life, I’ve had a lot of relationship problems within the past 6 months. I cannot even express the anguish of it, although anyone who has ever felt heartbroken and torn inside-out will know what I mean. Anyways, other than praying deeply for a year of good health, fortune and happiness, I asked hard to be blessed with guidance on how to be a better person and show the girl I truly care about how I felt. I wanted my relationship not to become a burden, but a source of happiness, satisfaction and compassion. I am a simple person, I do not expect monetary riches in life, I want my life to be filled with things you can’t buy in a store – happiness, love and family.
Generally I’m not a big vegetarian food lover – I’d fall apart without meat, lol, but when it comes to the food they make at the temple, it is amazing. They make things with so much flavour and vibrancy that it makes you want to eat it and feel satisfied! The problem I have with vegetarian food is the fact they taste bland and not fulfilling after you eat it, but not here, yummy! So we chatted and ate, I had seconds and I think almost everyone else did too! We went back upstairs and finished the rest of the “tour”…. I was glad to be upstairs again because the temple basement is extremely deep and it kills off any chance of you getting phone/internet reception down there. It was nice to be “in touch with civilization” again.. LOL.
Also, my friends brought a camera with them (obviously – what self respecting Asian doesn’t take a camera on a “t0ur”? haha.) and we took some pictures and even I took some of the decorations. Although we went and took some pics on CNY, it was packed with people that I didn’t even get to see (or COULD see) them but now, with less bodies around, I actually got to take in the beautiful decorations and design! After taking “a few” pictures, they also had a stand for a “wishing tree” where you could hang up your year’s wish for a few dollars and all the donations collected were going to Haiti, so why not? My mom and I bought one and so did our friends and we could choose a place on the tree to hang them up!
We didn’t do any grocery shopping today because everyone wanted to go home… and on the way home, I realized that I should’ve because my friend’s birthday party is coming up on Saturday and I was supposed to get her some “Chinese Beer” – urg… now I have to go to the Chinese stores near here just to see if they have it. When I got home, I started talking to one of my friends and as usual, we talked for an hour or two. She had to take a shower… good thing or else we would’ve never stopped, lol. She always cheers me up (not that it was a bad day or anything) – but what made it better is that BeBe and I are starting to talk again. Really – my life is so much better now, I don’t care whether this is “progress” or anything, just her talking to me made me head swirl with happiness, pure BLISS. Life is grand today – and hopefully “forever after” too…. I’m just so ecstatic right now this feeling is better than being high … not that I actually know what that feels like 😀
This weekend has been busy for me so I really lacked posting any “flow content”… so I’ll try to conjure something up in the next few days on-topic 🙂 Toodles everyone!
Found this before going to sleep.. I didn’t want to include it in my previous “sales” post because it’ll probably be missed:
@Costco …. $3 off on boxes of Always Pantiliners (Box of 160) – valid at participating Western/Eastern Canada Costco’s (Membership Req’d)
I thought I’d write something a bit abstract today, rather than my usual period-postings since it’s a Friday. For the past while, I’ve been pondering something one of my ex’s have said to me. Now, you might wonder why I seem to talk about my ex’s a lot, it is because all my ex’s with the exception of one, I keep in touch with – some, on even a regular basis. I’m a believer that just because two people didn’t make it to the final stretches of a relationship, doesn’t mean we can’t be friends. Sometimes, this connection even helps break barriers because we might say stuff like, “Hey, remember when we…..?” and it brings back a lot of happy memories. I know it is very typical for most people to cut contact with those whom they have broken up with, but I really think that’s just a nasty closure to things, unless we’re talking about break ups as a result of infidelity or abuse. I truly cherish all the girls who have ever been a part of my life, and most of my ex’s can probably read and attest to this 🙂
Nevertheless, today, I’m going to cover how amazing it is to connect with similar people or maybe, even people who you have striking chemistry with. A lot of the people I’ve met in my life, I’ve gotten to know them over time and began to enjoy their company. However, there’s only maybe a handful of people who’ve I met that I could say that I “instantly click” with – and this doesn’t cover just girls, I’m talking about guy-friends as well. This recent summer, I met a friend through a distant relative… they go to the same school and she just happened to tag along. She was outspoken, but not shy, we talked a bit and it was very relaxed, not tense like most “first-time meet” situations. We maybe spoke for 20 minutes at most before she had to leave, because the person she came with had alternate plans for the day and they were dropping by just to say hi.
Through Facebook, I managed to find this new-found friend and decided to take a shot and add her… hell, if she doesn’t accept, there’s no loss – LOL. Luckily for me, she accepted my request and through there, we chatted a bit through wall-to-wall and kind of indirectly got to know each other. I honestly didn’t think either of us were shy at all, we talked like we really knew each other, lol. Since most of you probably don’t know me very well, I’m one of those people who can talk for 3-4 hours without wincing. I decided it kind of got spammy talking over Facebook, as it’d fill up each others pages when it’d be more efficient to talk over IM. She had her email address as part of the FB profile, so I went and sent her a request.
At first, getting used to talking directly over IM was a bit of an ice breaker, but once we go through all of that, messages were flying back and forth. We’d talk about drama series, games, things we did during the day, our friends, life, etc. the list could go on forever. Although we talk every couple of days, we never seem to run out of topics to talk about. She’s busy with school and I’m busy with work and although those both are very mundane things, we never seem to have problems conjuring something up to talk about. You might wonder why I bring this up as a worthy topic, but I remember when my ex-ex girlfriend and I broke up, we were trying to mend things together over a course of 3-4 years. We really wanted to make the best of what we had, remember the happiness of the past, while moving forward with our new lives. I keenly remember asking her, “How can we be friends again?” (we had problems maintaining a conversation with each other without ending up in an argument or the conversation would die out after 10-20 messages) and she replied to me that friends don’t have to look for topics to talk about and they shouldn’t have to think about everything they say just so it doesn’t offend one another. Although I knew the truth, I didn’t want to believe it, but through this friend, she has proven to me that friends don’t need to find things to topic about, rather, conversations flow freely and without worry. I actually believe my ex-ex was a good 2-3 years younger than me, yet her mindset was so much more mature a few years ago.
Anyways, this friend of mind is really fun to talk to and it’s too bad she doesn’t come on every night 😛 When we do talk, I swear sometimes we totally drag each other on and on until one of us calls it quits, lol. Almost every time we talk, we have set a time “when we’re going to get off” but our “bye” ends up in another 30 minute conversation 😀 I don’t think we ever bore each other, somehow we just have things to talk about, whether something serious or something completely informal. Every once in a while we’ll drop each other offline messages and it just brightens up the day. You know how most people have a friend that they look forward to talking to everyday or just hearing something as simple as, “Hey, how are things going?” – she’s one of those types! If you think we know each other really well and that’s the reason why we connect, let me say upfront that we’ve only met in person once, lol. The age gap between us is huge… I think 6 years, yet we get along really well. Sometimes we’re pretty geeky when it comes down to talking, haha, we’re so lazy sometimes that instead of talking online in front of a computer, we’ll actually talk to each other through IM on our phones 8) Last night, she just told me she’s planning to get a new iPhone, so things will be even more geeky when we’re playing iPhone games and talking IM at the same time, lol. Geeky yar?
She’s really nice and easy to get along with and honestly, I think I talk to her more than my distant relative (who I met her through). I’m not sure if it’s because we’re closer in age than my relative (since I think she’s like 1-2 years even younger), but when it comes to talking, we “click”. I’m not saying as if our conversations have never went silent before, but a lot of it has to do with us being preoccupied with something. I remember a few days ago, she kept on sending me Youtube videos while I was trying to practice my presentation… and instead of doing that, we ended up watching YT clips, hahaha.. such a horrible influence she is on me 😉 Nevertheless, last night, she was trying to get her project done and we ended up talking for 3 hours until she was like “OMG, I really need to finish this tonight…” and she mentioned having to stay up – but I certainly hope she didn’t pull an all-nighter! I’m not sure whether it is a good idea when we start talking to each other – lol, although I admit she has a lot more willpower than me to stop…. what can I say, I’m conversationally-addicted! I think we both realize that the only time we should talk to each other is when we don’t have anything pressing to do, haha… or else it is just beacuse we intentionally procrastinate what we’re supposed to be doing 😀
So ya… through something that my ex-ex said to me almost 3 years ago, it suddenly dawned upon me that even between friends, chemistry exists to a degree where there are people who you can talk to and those who you can really talk to and it makes all the difference in a day. I find myself feeling more cheerful when I get to talk to her, she makes me laugh, smile and sometimes even hold my stomach in pain. Sometimes getting to know someone isn’t even about seeing that person face-to-face everyday, it is about effective, engaging and meaningful communication. I feel grateful that I can make friends like these, because with a world this vast, it is not every day you meet a person that you look forward to talk to and enjoy every moment of it. We connect even when we’re not joking around or talking about something we enjoy, but we’ve had serious conversations about matters before that still are enjoyable and is a way for us to get to know each other. These are perhaps, once-in-a-lifetime friends that while you might make many friends throughout your lifetime, there are the select few that you’d trust everything on your mind and speak at-ease.
I’ve found that over the past few months, I’ve been a lot more grateful to my friends, to people I meet and even acquaintances. Life is wonderful when you have people around you who you truly enjoy being with and can relate to. While we both grew up in very separate environments, her – the typical Hong Kong snooty princess and I, the poor immigrant – those things are simply overlooked when we’re talking. It is through talking to dissimilar, yet similar people that we find ourselves, learn about others and merge wisdom by having friends from every background, culture, gender, sexual orientation, race and experiences. She messaged me today and I missed her – I hate that! Now who knows when the next time I’ll see her online will be, lol, she’s a busy bee like that!
But anyways, to close off the night, for those who don’t keep up with my “happenings”, I recently took up Tae Bo, for those who don’t know what it is, see the Wikipedia quote:
Tae Bo is an aerobic exercise routine that became popular in the 1990s. It was developed by taekwondo practitioner Billy Blanks and was one of the first “cardio-boxing” programs to enjoy commercial success. Such programs use the motions of martial arts at a rapid pace designed to promote fitness. The name Tae Bo is a portmanteau of tae kwon do and boxing. 
Blanks developed the routine in 1976 by combining dance with elements from his martial arts and boxing training to form a workout regimen. During the 1990s, a series of videos were mass-marketed to the public; by 1999 an estimated 1 billion sets of videos had been sold on the back of a frequently aired television infomercial. As a result, Tae Bo became somewhat of a pop culture phenomenon in the late 1990s. Gyms began offering kickboxing-based fitness classes similar to Tae Bo. Since Blanks had taken out a trademark on the name they were not allowed to use the term Tae Bo without paying a licensing fee. Tae Bo videos and DVDs continue to rank among the top sellers in the fitness genre and derivative classes are still offered at many gyms.
Tae Bo classes are taught worldwide. Tae Bo includes many of the same punches and kicks as karate, but is not intended for fighting—it was not meant for any combat or self-defense applications. There are no throws, grappling moves, or ground fighting techniques in Tae Bo. Its only intent is to increase fitness through movement. Tae Bo also includes aerobic exercises intended to strengthen all muscles of the body with basic choreography.
The high-intensity workout is intended to increase cardiovascular fitness, strength, muscular endurance and flexibility.
Although I was doing a Quattro fitness workout for about 3 weeks, I’ve found it to be extremely boring and is not as engaging as Tae Bo. Furthermore, while I was working out my abs and legs, I found very little effect when it came to trying to sweat off the weight or help to get my heart pumping. Although I’m less than a week into Tae Bo, I can tell you I’m very pleased with it and it already has visible effects to my cardiovascular strength. I used to get tired very easily doing lifting, running or any type of “heart-intensive” movements. Over the week, I’ve found each day my heart pounds less hard after every work out – I feel energized and refreshed (although a bit smelly… ya, sweat doesn’t smell good). After 30 minutes (of 44 minutes) I’m drenched in sweat, my heart is getting a good work-out and it relaxes ALL the muscles in my body. Besides swimming, I could never come up with an activity that would target the entire body. So far, I’ve still failed to complete the entire circuit all in one go as I start losing strength about half an hour through, but it is my goal that I will be able to do a few minutes more each day until I am able to do the entire 44-minute run.
I have several friends who have done or still do, Tae Bo and one of the best results that came of it was 25 lbs over 3 months. If I’m able to lose 25 lbs of fat I’ll be off to a damn good start! One of my coworkers did say that I should expect to gain some weight at first because I’m now converting this fat into muscles, thus, my overall weight will go up until the fat is burned off. I’m not so much concerned about my weight per se, but I need to slender-down my body and tone a few places, most notably my face. Asian people tend to have rounder facial structures, therefore, whenever we gain “meat on our faces” it tends to show a LOT (one of the things that suck about being Asian). On a regular white male, “fat faces” don’t seem to appear until we’re talking about grossly excessive weight. For instance, my coworker who I just mentioned weighed 260lbs at one point and looking at some old photos of him, even though he was “big”, his face did not show it. I weigh way less than than him, yet I have a terrible “fat face” problem 😐 See, when fat is elsewhere, it can be “hidden” via clothes, but it is rather hard to hide my face, lol.
So I’m really hopeful that Tae Bo will be one of the workouts I’ll be able to stick to and in all reality, my lack of success from these exercises is that I feel disengaged and lack motivation. Because Tae Bo is fun, I’m hoping it will act as a motivator and because Billy Blanks does a good job of keeping his assistants energized that it really adds to the workout and fueling my energy. A large reason why I switched from the previous workout as well is because I started getting pains and I recently even hurt my neck I think. I must’ve pulled a muscle or pinched a nerve because for the past few days it felt like someone was jabbing pins into the neck. Once I finish Tae Bo, that pain actually goes away for a good 6-8 hours! Clearly this exercise even has medicinal effects, lol. Obviously whatever exercises were incorporated into the previous workout was not suited for me or perhaps I didn’t have the right form. Nevertheless, finding something that gets my heart beating, blood flowing and most importantly, sweating like a pig, will help get rid of that fat!
I am soooooooooo tired tonight it is not even funny. I had to visit 2 sites today and go through 3 back-to-back meetings. I’m drained physically and psychologically as there’s so much on my mind! I need to sleep before I wake up with keyboard keys stuck to my face, lol.
Night my valued readers 🙂
P.S Feminine Hygiene sales from flyers are going up tomorrow, not all the pictures were available today so I didn’t want to post them up without it….
Poh Ching’s just going to love this… I feel emo today for some reason (no I’m not having my period… lol) … I heard a song on the radio as I was driving to work, probably a left over from valentines day and I had to turn Shazam on my phone (it’s a program that recognizes a songs lyrics/tune) and figure out the artist/song name. It grabbed it – go technology! When I got home, I had to listen to it again… it isn’t that I haven’t heard this song a million times before (I’m into oldies, probably due to my Dad listening to them a lot…) but I couldn’t quite put my finger on the song name.
I don’t have much to say tonight because today at work was so busy I didn’t even known how to manage my time. It isn’t really like there was “a lot of work to do” – but rather, I have been so lazy for the past while that getting my ass moving again was hard. Also, I’m feeling a bit sore from Tae Bo which I started yesterday along with my exercise routine so that I can lose some weight. I took some pictures for Chinese New Years and I’m too embarrassed to post them ANYWHERE, because I look so fat and ugly in them. Thus, this is really giving me to the motivation to lose weight and look good again, because believe me, at one point, I attracted a lot of girls – LOL. Actually, even with my fat face there’s something about me girls dig… I’ll get to it another time, something that happened this weekend, haha. I figured if at any time I lose motivation to work out, I’m going to print out my photos of CNY and tack it to my treadmill, TV and all over the house, hahaha.
Today, I feel the sadness kicking in from CNY/V-Day not being able to spend it with my BeBe. Perhaps over the weekend I had so much company that it diluted the pain, but today, it kicked in full throttle…. and listening to the song in the morning made me even sadder. I don’t have much to say today, so I’ll leave you guys with the song that was on the radio… it makes me cry every time I listen to it, especially when I’m having relationship problems.
I find myself singing to this song, because the lyrics really describe how I feel. Sometimes you can’t help but feel attuned to a song. What beautiful lyrics, what happened to all the artists nowadays who can’t come up with songs other than swearing or inaudible words from screaming?
For those who celebrate it, Happy Chinese New Years!
It is Valentines day ❤ as well, a very rare and odd occasion for both events to happen on the same day! I’ll have some pictures and videos to post up later on, but it’s awfully late and tomorrow is another day-of-action waiting to happen. I’ll update this post or completely repost it when the content is up or I decide to make some changes!
Of course this blog and my life is dedicated to my sweet BeBe who gives me the drive to be the best person I can be and to be successful in life! Without her, I would never be who I am today.
I might be occupied with guests and new years festivities for the next few days, so don’t expect any updates… although I might sneak one in if I have time 😛
One would like to hope on a day like this, commitment and loyalty would be important 😛 … talking to my cousin and apparently not-so, LOL:
It is in the context of me asking him why he still has his Relationship Status on Facebook set to “Single” when he’s been with the same girl for 1 year… and such is the result. I only threw it in the “God” jab because him and his family are HIGHLY religious, so I would’ve thought he’d be the “act like a saint” personality 😀
Looks like I lied again about not doing an update today, but we got home surprizingly early, so hey, whatever! I guess you could say today has been pretty darn good, considering all the negativity which started the day. Actually, I wouldn’t say so much as to being negativity, but definitely the day brought along some pretty big challenges. I must say, I feel very happy today as a result of many things. Let’s start from the beginning for all of this to make sense. Yesterday night (Thursday), my cousin messaged me to tell me that she dropped her external hard drive and asked me if I knew of a way to fix it. I told her that if it was just a broken external case, we could just replace the enclosure. However, if there was physical damage, then usually most end-users consider the drive “dead”… with the exception of that data recovery can still be done, but must be done at a specialized lab.
I had already planned to meet a friend for dinner on Friday, so it worked out ok that I’d pick her up at a nearby subway station then backtrack to one of the guys who do contract work for me on computers. He has the same tools that I would at home, so rather than bringing my cousin all the way in and going back out (about a 1 hour drive), I decided to take her to the guy’s shop. He did some thorough testing and sure enough, the result was that physical damage was done to the drive. Hell, just picking up the hard drive you can hear “clicking sounds” and in general, it is never a good idea to hear that type of clicking inside a hard drive.
Unfortunately for her, it was not as easy as just moving the hard drive to another case because it was the hard drive itself that was damaged. I could already see her disappointment… I truly prayed that it was something simple like that, but knew within me that from the way she described the fall the hard drive took and the clicking sounds upon picking it up, it was never a good sign to begin with. However, I had to make sure that we tried the least expensive method first before going to the extremes. I had already told her about a data recovery centre (DRC) that I work closely with who can probably get her data back if it was physically damaged. I told her the costs are quite hefty, but will be her best bet. Oh, did I mention she also needs the data back to Monday? YA, that’s the hard part! Not only is a 3-day turn around pretty damn good if it happens, but the coming Monday happens to be “Family Day” – a holiday which most places have off in Ontario. The DRC has both “rush” 12-72 hour service or “standard” 3-5 business days. Clearly, 3-5 business days was out of the question for her since she has all her school and work related data on there… you can’t IMAGINE how much important data is on the drive, like…. her entire school/work life?
I could see she was totally sunk when we had to resort to a DRC since I gave her a cost figure for the last one I submitted for a client… uhh.. “not cheap” is how I would describe it. She comes from a wealthy family, so money was not an issue for her, but it was the “possibility” of whether they could get the data back or not, and how fast. You know what? Naturally, I have a soft spot for girls. I can’t help but want to take care of them and do every little thing for them. I’m still one of those old fashion guys who still “open the car door for girls” – LOL! So anyways, even seeing her like that made me sad for her. Normally, I am a man of little sympathy, lol – if someone does something stupid, they deserve whatever is coming their way… including the failure to properly back-up data. If she wasn’t my cousin, I probably would’ve laughed at her and charged her $250 an hour to get her data back, lol. Seeing her sad, made me sad 😦 I would’ve had a soft spot for girls anyways and would’ve felt bad, but even more so because she was related to me – blah, I’m a sucker for chicks!
So we called ahead to the nearest DRC drop-off point and it was almost an hour’s drive away… yet, I decided to drive all the way in the opposite direction (which we just came from) to get her hard drive to the DRC as fast as we could. The lady at the place who we phoned told us they’d be able to process it immediately today if we were able to get it to them within a few hours. Of course, given that her data is time-critical, I wanted to do as much as I could to help her out. We drove out (and took longer due to disgusting traffic) and when we dropped it off, we decided to go for lunch. We found a place nearby, had our lunch and the DRC had already called us back regarding a quote for the service. Luckily, I believe they expect a “full recovery”. This was pretty thrilling since the data on the drive has been her heart and soul and will likely determine whether she’ll be able to apply for her Masters.
Before the DRC proceeds, they have to verify whether the quote is acceptable or not to the customer. So they checked with her and she decided to proceed with the recovery. Let’s just say the amount was “a few thousand dollars”… yes, YIKES! Either way, the data is that important to her so she confirmed the quote so they could immediately proceed to recovery the data. With most of the anguish behind us knowing the data will likely be ok, things relaxed up a bit… However, the funny situation occurred where she realized her credit card limit is actually too low to pay for it. LOL. She called her bank to have it raised, but obviously with the absence of a credit evaluation, they sure as hell aren’t going to give it to you right away. She’s a full-time student as well, which means they evaluated that she would not have a regular job-income to qualify to have a higher credit limit. She looks sooooo sad it made me want to cry, haha… so she was talking to the guy at the DRC trying to tell him whether she could pay one half… clear the amount off her card and then give them the second half. Obviously, this doesn’t fly at all with a business when there’s an outstanding payment like that. (Sigh), why do I have to be a sucker for girls? I called the guy back, gave him my credit card number so he could process the drive immediately. She was happy… then I was happy – I smiled, life is good when people around you are happy! It is amazing how influential smiling can be… I remember the first time I saw my BeBe smile.. I think it was when I finished setting up a new computer for her to watch movies/shows on, it was the most beautiful smile in my life I have EVER seen (not that anyone could surpass or match that beauty anyways, PSH!).
We walked around the mall for a bit, got some small-eats and some bubble tea and then it was almost time to meet our friends for dinner. I dropped her off at a nearby subway station so she could get home. I wouldn’t have minded driving her, but I severely hate Toronto downtown traffic, so I avoid going there unless it is absolutely necessary… and since I already had alternate plans, that wouldn’t have been possible anyways.
After having dinner, my friends and I decided to go to T&T (a large Chinese supermarket) to pick up some groceries. There are T&T’s scattered around town, but this was the first time I went to this particular location. Remember how I always complain about how there’s very few places that sell maxi pads from Asia? I FOUND THEM! Ok well, obviously not the same number as ones I can find in Hong Kong or actual Asian regions, but they had a good compliment of it there… oh, but let me tell you, the prices did not make me smile, LOL. However, at least I know where I can get them! Maybe I’ll get some next time I visit there when I head out there with my friend’s Katie or S.L. Not only did I find some regular HK branded ones there, I even found some amazing Japanese ones! 😀
Yep, I found some Elis Ultra Guard 36cm 😛 It was like 9.99 for a package of 16 or something. I didn’t look TOO closely since I was with a bunch of people who I have not been open with about my interests so it’s ok, I’m sure I’ll have plenty of other opportunities. T&T was actually not part of our original plan but after dinner, my friends said they wanted to go buy some stuff and “walk off the food” – so I said sure. I suppose being a good samaritan sometimes pays off, otherwise, I would’ve never known only this particular T&T location had a large variety of Asian pads.
But anyways, the moral of the story is…. always find reliable methods of data backup just in case something happens. This is especially important for students because I find oddly enough, computers always like to break right before an exam, due date or any other “important” student event. Having worked so many years in this field, I swear that events like that is when data failure occurs… it is like the data has a self-destruct sequence on it. Poor cousin had to learn this the hard way and spend a crapload of money just to get her files back. It’s a good thing she comes from a wealthy background or your average person wouldn’t be paying that kind of money to get their data back… they’d just accept the loss and move on.
P.S. for the people who are lucky enough to live in the GTA, you can now find Asian pads at the Warden T&T!!! Let me know if you know of other places (especially if they’re cheaper!)
A few weeks ago, an impromptu conversation with a few of my workers really got me thinking about the idea of “wealth” and how a person defines whether an individual is wealthy or not. I think in a general sense, most of us would instinctively define wealth by the amount of money that a person has. I’m not going to get all philosophical or spiritual and all and start defining wealth by non-materialistic means and for the time being, let us concentrate simply on a numeric and monetary value.
Having grown up in a tradition Chinese setting, the use of money has always been very conservative. From day one when I began handling money, I was taught to save-save-save, something that (out of the words of my coworker), that North Americans tend not to do… they spend whatever happens to be in their hands. Looking at people I know, I can definitely say that it goes without saying that there certainly is truth… most of my friends/colleagues who are your general “white Canadian” families tend not to keep money “lying around”. Although I come from a wealthy family, my immediate family (mom/dad) did not arrive in Canada with that wealth. The money that they came to Canada with went to pay for their rent and they had to actually save up over a course of a year before being able to pay back the money for the flight over.
Let’s skip too much detail and jump to ‘now’. Growing up for me was definitely a very “make do with what we have” lifestyle. I can honestly say my parents were the type to give up everything just for me. I was always able to attend school events (in fact, they urged me to) albeit our financial situation. While we were never “poor” – we were certainly not rich either. What prompted the discussion between my coworkers and I was the fact I always mention the word “poor” when I describe myself and they like to make a note that poor should not be the world I use to describe myself because I really “don’t know what the word POOR means.”
This leads me on to the topic of how people perceive the difference between degrees of wealth. Suffice to say, I don’t think anyone in this world has the same definition or “amount” they would label between everything from poor to filthy rich. For instance, I consider myself poor, much to the chastise of my coworkers because I do not feel I “make enough money” and that I “don’t have enough to spend” when clearly, they feel otherwise. Personally, I feel a better has to make > $100,000 before they can consider themselves “rich” – which I currently don’t make, therefore, I class myself as being poor. Working in a unionized, government institution, all our salaries are available to the public (provincially mandated information) so essentially, all my coworkers know exactly how much I make a year. They ask me how given the amount I make, I could actually consider myself poor. After a good 2-hour talk with them, they made me truly reevaluate the money I make and why I feel poor. They started putting things into perspective for me, that the average Canadian generally do not even have enough money to maximize contributions in both TFSA (Tax-free Savings Account for the non-Canadians who don’t know) and RRSP (Registered Retirement Savings Plan) in a single year. Most people are tied up paying off mortgages, loans (student or otherwise), credit cards, bills, car financing and the likes that to be able to max-out contributions to both those accounts is impossible. Yearly, I am able to comfortably pay off all those bills/loans/owing balances while maximizing contributions to my RRSP/TFSA and invest my money into steady investments (such as GIC’s) and even have money to play the stock market. They made a point to tell me to look at my overall assets instead of simply what I keep “liquid” in my Chequings accounts. Surely, I cannot be THAT poor when I still have money to buy food, spend on entertainment (and girls? LOL… by that, I don’t mean hookers/strippers), and splurge on new technology once in a while.
While I’m generally not comfortable with sharing financial information with people, my coworker (who has been close with my family) asked bluntly how much money I had in my accounts all together. I told her and her jaw must’ve stayed opened for a good 2 minutes. I can remember her words very clearly, “You are what? How old? 24? You OWN a house, drive a luxury vehicle, have no debt, maximize yearly contributions, invest into stocks, live comfortably, and have xxx amount of money in your accounts and you call yourself POOR?!!” – that really smacked me in the face.. not as in negatively – but it really set things into perspective with how wealthy in comparison I am to many. Over the past few weeks, I really took some time to think about all that I really do have and that has changed on what I felt is considered “wealthy.”
Of course I am far from being wealthy in comparison to the rest of my family who own billion-dollar computer corporations, chairman of an international organization and CEO of 5-star hotels – but I have a very SOLID footing for someone of my age. I know that at any time, I could be a part of the massive wealth should I return to Hong Kong, but knowing that I will lose my very comfortable lifestyle in Canada… my steady job, my own business, my (lots) of leisure time and standard working hours – which is something that does not exist when it comes to managing a large business. I for one, prefer to simply be spoiled out of my mind every time I return “home” instead, even though I do not get the same luxury here.
How do you define wealthy? What are your expectations and where do you draw the line before you title someone as wealthy? Is it simply by what they make in a year, the job they hold or the materialistic things they have to show for it?
I’ll tell you, my opinion of my status before talking to my coworkers have really turned around…. and that’s why it is always nice to have older and wiser friends who can really set things straight in your mind, because in all reality, I’m just a little boy in a big guy’s body 😛