So now it sucks that I have to point out this brand in particular, but, it’s right-on-topic with what I want to speak about. Being an avid fan of periods, perhaps I may not be as bothered by the idea of menstrual fluid, the sight, smell or even presence of it – but others may be, whether male or female. I can understand the fear that some girls may be self-conscious about their own smell or might even feel disgusted about their own smell that they would consider using scented products. This doesn’t just have to do with scented tampons or pads, but there is also quite a market out there of women who feel that they need to “feel fresh” by using things like vaginal wipes or sprays. My question is, “is it really necessary?”
Yes, our body does not emanate the most beautiful smells. Even those who use fragrance soaps and perfume – let’s face it, WE do not naturally smell good, we are only masking our own natural body smell. Suffice to say, it doesn’t mean we should discard hygiene and let ourselves smell like crap, but our body, especially our sensitive areas like our pubic region don’t need to smell like flower petals. Furthermore, we all know that these scents are just chemicals, so why on earth would we even consider putting chemicals near our private areas? If you don’t wash your face regularly with acid, then you probably wouldn’t want to stuff a scented tampon in your vagina. Sure, the chemicals in those aren’t as harsh as acid, but the bottom line is… that they’re still chemicals.
For many women who still continue to use conventional feminine hygiene products, disposable pads and tampons – they’re already subjecting themselves to many foreign materials and using scented products is just like adding salt to a wound. I’ve managed to persuade most of my girls who uses scented products to stay away from them or for ones who are self-conscious to only use scented products when they feel that their period smell may be exposed easily. We all like to smell good, I’m not sure how many people on this world enjoy smelling bad if they had a choice, but scented feminine hygiene products aren’t the way to go. Honestly, even a pad or tampon that has been worn to the maximum and leaking, menstrual fluid smell would still be minimal. As a female, ask yourself, how many people would even be close to your vagina? Unless you work in the sex industry or as a stripper, would there be that many people close enough to your vagina where they’d be able to smell you? It’d be perhaps, your partner or at least someone whom you are comfortable enough to be so intimately close to – so is covering up the smell that important?
Let’s consider scented tampons for a moment. A tampon goes inside the vagina and stays there until it’s withdrawn and then thrown away. Please feel free to justify the reasoning of why a scented tampon is necessary because once you pull it out, it goes right into the garbage or down the toilet. Would the smell of menstrual flow for the 2 seconds prior to disposal be so bad where it’d be necessary to have a scented product? Also, I’ve seen my fair share of scented products and really, even the most scented product isn’t enough to completely mask the smell of the menstrual fluid. Don’t believe me? If you have the guts, try it yourself. Scented pads are pretty bad because the pad is already rubbing against your pubic region the whole day and with tampons, it’s sitting inside your body for up to 8 hours a day, times the number of tampons you use per day. We may enjoy the idea of our outer regions smelling good and thus, we use heavily scented soaps or feminine wipes, but why does the inside of the vagina need to smell good? Douching has been a long-standing practice, especially for some cultures or backgrounds – but did you know that douching should be something that’s done only on the recommendation of a doctor? Douching can be bad for the vagina because it may upset the delicate pH balance of the vagina.
As I mentioned, I don’t know of too many of my girls who use scented products so for those who do or have used them, for what reason do you prefer scented products? I know some products don’t come with a choice, for instance, Stayfree pads used to have both scented and unscented versions – but not anymore as the all come slightly scented. I can understand if you’ve used a certain product for so long where you don’t feel persuaded to change products, but for those who are using a product such as Playtex tampons where they do have scented and unscented products – why would you opt to use the scented, especially knowing that it truly is unnecessary (or unless you have reasons to deem it necessary)? This is not meant to entice an argument or to say that those who uses scented products as “wrong” – but rather, let us discuss the pros and cons and weigh them as to whether using scented products is a sound idea.
For the women who use liners on a daily basis to stay fresh, then perhaps I can under that manufactures want to add scent to it to encourage the idea that a good smell is the way you stay fresh. You can’t stay fresh just by relying on a scented pantiliner, but also with proper hygiene and changing of underwear on a regular or daily basis. I understand that some women get discharge regularly or have to deal with overactive vaginal lubrication, which sometimes doesn’t have the most pleasent smell or causes that “damp” feeling against your vagina, but yet, isn’t that the point of underwear? Underwear was meant to provide us with a buffer between our bodily fluids and the rest of the world. I looked up the “purpose of underwear” and one important point that came up is that underwear is to “support and protect your genital“. With that said, a bit of gunk on your underwear isn’t going to cause major issues unless you have a very heavy discharge or soaking issue, then, I can see the necessity of wearing a pantiliner regularly.
The vagina, just like any part of our body requires “breathing space” and using a pantiliner every day prevents that. Pantiliners, as part of a pre-menstrual and post-menstrual application is reasonable, but every day is almost excessive. Beyond the consideration of having your vagina stuffed up by products, also consider wearing underwear that’s more air permeable. Wearing breathable articles of clothing may make you think that just exposes your “smell” more, but by improving the OVERALL HEALTH of your pubic area, you are helping it, not hindering it.
Remember the reasons why you chose scented products in the first place, review it and see if it still really makes sense to stick with them! If you want to smell good, consider all your other healthier options.
Oh my lord, I was so excited when I read this story! Finally, women who appreciate a guy’s openness in menstruation and being caring about it. Sure, I admit I might be more over-zealous compared to these guys when it comes to periods and feminine hygiene, but it’s probably better I’m like that than the opposite and be those guys who utterly hate and are disgusted by a bit of menstrual flow and products!
Below is a repost of the article which I found from Camster of Kayo’s – thank you for your findings:
The decision to cohabit with my now ex-boyfriend Jeff was prompted by a fight over my period.
Jeff and I came back to my place after dinner to find my male roommate and some of his buddies sitting on the couch. He was angry because he just got laid off. He was drunk. In general he was a big a**hole.
I see a man’s reaction to my period as a litmus test. I know it sounds strange, but the way a guy acts about my menstrual cycle tells me a lot about what kind of guy he is and how he feels about womanhood.
“Wash your dishes,” my roommate shouted as I walked in the door.
“I haven’t been home,” I replied. “I will.”
I looked at Jeff, my incredibly shy boyfriend, hoping he would stick up for me. He put his head down.
My roommate proceeded with his attack.
“And get your disgusting period stained underwear out of the laundry room,” he yelled.
I am never usually at a loss for words. But the mention of a pair of period stained underwear in front of a crowd of men really humiliated me. For the record, I had washed them and left them to dry in the laundry room. A room appropriate for such activities.
I felt my face get hot. That’s when Jeff sprung to action. I saw his jaw tense.
“Who the hell do you think you are?” Jeff shouted at my roommate. “She’s a woman, she bleeds, man!”
Jeff grabbed my hand.
“We’re leaving here now,” he said, escorting me out of the apartment.
I never heard Jeff raise his voice before and I never loved him more for doing it. It turned out my shy boyfriend had some throw-down factor when it came to his woman. That was all I needed to know. We decided to move in together that evening.
Since then, I’ve seen a man’s reaction to my period as a litmus test. I know it sounds strange, but the way a guy acts about my menstrual cycle tells me a lot about what kind of guy he is and how he feels about womanhood.
A few years ago, I was on my third date with David.* We were in the middle of brunch at a French Bistro when Aunt Flo came for a very unexpected visit.
“I have to run to the drug store,” I told him.
He looked confused, but didn’t ask any questions. When I returned with a box of tampons and went to the bathroom again, I think he solved the equation. But David didn’t say anything. He just pretended like it didn’t happen, which in turn made me feel slightly uncomfortable. I know we didn’t know each other that well, but a joke or a smile or at least an acknowledgement from him would have been much appreciated. It was a metaphor for the rest of our six-month relationship. David never really said much about what he thought about anything. So when I told him I was falling in love with him, I was surprised to discover that he wasn’t feeling the same way.
Recently, I started dating Dan* who invited me to spend the night at his place.
“I want to spend the night, but I have my period,” I told Dan.
“That’s great news!” he exclaimed.
“Really? Why?” I asked slightly thrown off by his reaction. I had never seen a man so excited that I was bleeding.
“It’s always a relief for a guy to hear that,” he said. “No bun in the oven.”
In the middle of the night, I woke up and discovered a blood stain on his white sheets. I was mortified. I woke him up.
“Something bad happened,” I said.
“Are you OK?” he asked. I pointed to the blood stain.
“Do you have a stain stick or some Oxyclean?” I asked panicked.
“Don’t worry about that. It’s not a big deal. We’ll deal with it in the morning.”
Dan* reached his arms out and wrapped them around me. He kissed me on the cheek.
“Now go back to sleep and stop worrying,” he said.
Good man, I thought as I drifted off.
*Name has been changed
Since the posting of the article, it has received quite a few comments. You can navigate to see all the comments using the link above as part of the article, but here are some that I found particularly pleasing 🙂
wrote on April 28, 2011 @ 1:32 PM
For growing up with a sister only 2 years older then him, my boyfriend seemed completely clueless about periods when we started living together (I was the first girl he ever lived with). But now he has gotten completely over his initial squeamishness with it to be totally over it. One of the most amazing things I ever saw him do was empty the trash can that had used pads in it. I immediately panicked when he picked it up and ran over saying “I’ll take care of it” and he just shrugged at me and said “It’s ok, they are wrapped, it doesn’t bother me.” That moment for some reason just completely floored me. I also leave a tampon in the glove box of HIS car. At first he protested, but now it’s like it’s not even there among his tools and insurance papers.
wrote on April 28, 2011 @ 5:02 PM
I was going to the store once and asked my partner if he wanted anything and he decided to come with me. When we got inside I said something like “Well you can go get your stuff, I have some other stuff to get” and he just looked at me like I was crazy “I don’t care if you need to get pads. They’re ~right here~ on the way to my ice cream. Just grab them now.”
wrote on April 28, 2011 @ 2:27 PM
I think it’s a better indicator if the guy is willing to get sexy when it’s that time of the month. If he isn’t overly squicked by that, hoorah!
wrote on April 28, 2011 @ 6:34 PM
Thank god I’m with someone who doesn’t give a flying f*ck. I get horrific cramps the first 2 days and a good orgasm makes them better for hours afterward.
wrote on April 28, 2011 @ 2:36 PM
I logged in just to say, Hydrogen Peroxide. It will get ANY blood stain out in a jiffy. We are talking the relatively minor period stained sheets to the dead deer in the back of the light colored SUV. (It hit my car and we try not to waste food.) Even guys usually have some H2O2 in the bathroom.
Also, any guy who freaks out about my period does not get access to my various lady parts because he obviously doesn’t deserve it.
wrote on April 28, 2011 @ 2:51 PM
I think it depends. My husband was an only child and I think unless you’ve shared a bathroom with a woman, it’s pretty easy to be freaked out by periods. He’s getting better though the longer we live together.
wrote on April 28, 2011 @ 3:31 PM
One of my past boyfriends was completely grossed out at the thought of bleeding vagina. I was so annoyed with him, because I’m ALWAYS horny during my period, and he didn’t want anything to do with that part of my body. At all.
My husband was completely okay with it. (Granted, he was married before me, so he was use to it anyway,) but he wasn’t scared. Doesn’t care if the shopping cart has feminine products in it, none of that stuff.
On a somewhat related note, I laughed when my husband (then boyfriend,) and I went camping for the first time. We stopped at the grocery store before going out of town to pick up food, and he made a point of buying toilet paper for me to use. (I was trained to squat and use ferns to wipe if I wanted to wipe. lol) I thought it was sweet that he was looking out for me, and I knew I should probably keep him around, but I couldn’t help but laugh.
Now if only bebe appreciated my interest and loving-care for her on/off her period, then I’d be set for life! 😆
So as I often wander and drift through the internet, I find myself reading forums and Q&A from sites. Having grown up as a forum-hopper as a teenager, I ran into many puberty-related resources, allowing open discussion between males and females, both questioners and moderators/professionals who provide information or intervene to make an expert opinion/diagnosis. With that said, many of these “specific” forums tend to be more positive towards questions and they’re answered with decency – or at least posts that are negative/insulting are removed/moderated. The internet is essentially “society” – just like when we’re offline and many of the same stigmas exist. Let me elaborate.
I was reading on a Q&A site and bumped into several different threads/sites which had males asking legitimate questions about menstruation. Furthermore, they did so tastefully so it was not a matter of, “Oh my god, please let me have your old pads!” – but rather, “I want to know what girls experience during their period” or “Do girls exercise during their period?” These questions appeared genuine and plus, some people might have called them “stupid questions” – but for males who never experience menstruation – how should they know any better? If they dare to post a question up of that sensitivity, surely they deserve an appropriate response. If the person reading/answering feels that they don’t want to answer, why must they feel the need to post a nasty response. Why is a male a PERVERT, a SICKO, a WEIRDO for wanting to learn about menstruation?
This situation is unfortunate, because women complain about men being ignorant or immature when it comes to menstruation. Yes, we have textbooks and we have school, but that is hardly “sufficient information about menstruation” – that is unless you happen to be in a medical field. For the general guy, simply skimming through our 1-page in the textbook during SexEd class or from the hearsay we get from guy friends (usually non-factual) harbour a very poor perception of menstruation in our minds. We’re criticized by women for being un-knowledgeable about menstruation but at the same time, we’re ALSO criticized when we want to genuinely learn about it. So what is it that women want or rather, do women just assume the information we absorb “from around us” is enough for us to have positive view of menstruation? We need brave and mature women who are willing to provide anecdotal support about their own menstrual experiences and educate men in these matters. We should not be degraded or berated for our willingness to learn – WHETHER this is a fetish or simply an interest.
As I was passing through Yahoo! Answers, it was so sad to see girls flocking down on this poor guy who made an honest question about periods. With a solid page of “answers” – most of them were either unhelpful or downright insulting towards this guy. Rather than taking the time to provide a useful answer, these girls told him off, called him names and made personal attacks – when these girls likely don’t even know this individual personally. Only a few “answers” that were posted addressed his question. What is it that women want? …Us to know about periods or us to remain immature about it and then blame us afterwards? I can understand that women might pounce on a guy who asks a question that is “highly inappropriate” – but these were all reasonable questions. Furthermore, if these women didn’t feel comfortable replying, why even post to yell at this poor guy who is trying to LEARN?
fetish fet·ish (fět’ĭsh, fē’tĭsh)
- Something, such as an object or a nonsexual part of the body, that arouses sexual desire and may become necessary for sexual gratification.
- An abnormally obsessive preoccupation or attachment.
Fetishes are usually not-harmful by nature. For instance, I love menstruation, but I don’t think I’ve ever “hurt” anyone as a result of my interests. At the same time, am I a fetishist or am I a learner? Menstruation IS related to a “sexual part of the body” (opposed to the definition of a fetish being a “non-sexual” part) – closely associated to the vagina, but is not a “part” itself. Likewise, it “may become necessary for sexual gratification” – and luckily for me, I haven’t hit that point where I feel menstruation is so deeply rooted in me where I can’t become sexually aroused without periods/feminine hygiene on my mind. Easy example is that I can easily become sexually excited just thinking about bebe – absence of her period or any products related to it. If someone DID label me as having a menstrual fetish, I also wouldn’t deny it, as I do have that border of “interest” and “excitement” – but nor would I agree 100% since it is the initial desire to learn more about menstruation where it later developed into a sexual-interest.
What though, separate fetishes over menstruation as it does to other ones – ones that people deem more “common” or even “acceptable”? In the world of men, I’m sure many of us wouldn’t deny that a good bra and panty would excite us. It seems like when guys talk about panties, it is pretty acceptable we think about it – but panties are a “non-sexual item” by nature and therefore, would be considered a fetish. Why is it “ok” for a man to have a fetish for an inanimate object, such as female underwear – but NOT ok when it comes to feminine hygiene products or a woman’s period? My ex used to always tease me by leaving some of her bras and panties on her bed so that I’d see them or she’s ask me to pick out for her what to wear underneath. However, my excitement was not necessarily the object itself, but the association. When I think about panties, I don’t get particularly excited. When I think about bebe’s panties or bras, they’re exciting because they’re HERS and the association is with her beauty and body. The other day, I was graced by seeing bebe’s panties/bra while I helped her pack and I was excited – only because she wears them and not so much the “item itself” and therefore the association with it being SEXY is based on her connection with them. So now, do I have a fetish for her panties or do I have a fetish for her? (The answer is obvious, LOL)
I have to say, there’s only been a handful of times I’ve ever felt bad about my interest in menstruation. I’ve received much praise and kudos for my dedication and commitment to being a positive male role model for menstruation. I’m sure many of my readers know my passion is probably have driven by fetish and half by knowledge – but still, does it really matter? I see so many of these poor guys who should have their curiosity fostered and to be able to engage in professional dialogue with a woman who is willing to answer their inquiries. If they pose a question and they’re hoarded by women berating him, what kind of attitude does that suggest? It suggests that men “do not need to know” or in fact “should NOT know” about menstruation and thus, we become negative towards menstruation through our experiences of being ridiculed. These poor male children, tweens or teens (and possibly even adult men) who make a genuine attempt at learning about menstruation will never ask a question about it again if they’re shot-down, what will they say to future generation of guys? Luckily for me, I have the support of many of my girls and even more proud of my girlfriend who is slowly opening up to me about her period and is willing to answer my questions to her. You have no idea how much that has changed my attitude towards her and how blessed/appreciative I feel over her openness in menstruation to me, especially because she’s not easy to pry information from, especially those of such sensitivity. Although it seems weird to take pride in your girlfriend’s period – I certainly do!
For all the men reading this, please find a woman whom you are comfortable with, trust and is willing to share her menstrual knowledge with you. For the women who read this, please extend your hand/knowledge of menstruation to willing-men around you… for this society has much to learn and crush the taboo of menstruation! If you suspect the guy is learning about menstruation because he as a fetish for it… why does it matter to you anyways? If you’re able to change the way another person views menstruation positively, educationally or otherwise, you’ve done a great job! And also… don’t assume anything about the guy when he’s asking a question – not all of us are cross-dressers, transsexuals or the-like 😛
This post has no educational value (nor is it period-related… unless I slip something in there). I just figured after a string of some period-posts, that I’d stick one of my random-thought posts in here.
For the past while, I’ve been playing a game called Just Cause 2. It was extremely addicting and playing for 5-hours was not exactly healthy – although it did kill time on days that I did not have side-work. Oh right, speaking of which, my past two weeks have been nuts. Other than my regular day job, I also do I.T. work on the side and almost every other week-day, I had a client who required my services. Oh yes, I absolutely love making money, but when every night you come home at 8-9PM, it isn’t so “lovely” anymore.. mind you I also worked 8 hours prior to that. So after calculating this month’s “additional income,” I am fairly happy with the results.
Every month, I worry about wanting more business and I don’t see why life can’t space things out for you, lol. I mean, last month was just crappy and all of a sudden the last 2 weeks of May, I’m bombarded. It’s funny, I guess humans can never be satisfied (or maybe just me :lol:).. either we complain about having too little or too much. However, I do have some extra dollars now to line my wallet with, especially because the past while I admit I have been on a spending spree. My girlfriend and I spent a lot of time eating out, which consequently other than probably not being great on my waistline, it also costs money. Rest assured, I am not complaining, I love spending time with her, even if it costs money XD – after all, money is made to be spent! Second, I bought a camera a while ago, for those who follow my blog… then third, I had to get a new computer case and power supply, so it all adds up! Well, I suppose at least I haven’t bought pads for a while, so there has been no expense for that (yet) 😛
So anyways, a few days at work, we had a breast cancer awareness day at work (not the “official” breast cancer awareness day) where workers were asked to wear an article of pink to show their support. I was holding a meeting in the meeting room outside of my office so a few of the attendees arrived and since my office is right there, I sat in my own office to wait.
Since I enjoy conversing a lot, a couple of the staff who I’m particularly closer to invited themselves in just to chit-chat (a guy and a girl). The other guy and I immediately noticed the girl wasn’t wearing anything pink, so we inquired. She replied, “Sure I am, you guys just can’t see it!” and the other guy and I both knew what that meant. This girl is a complete tease though. She plopped herself up on the corner of my desk and since I was sitting down and she was wearing a skirt, the eye-level was perfect. The other guy grinned and sat down next to me, but I totally turned away and looked at my monitor. Mind you, I dislike doing something while someone is talking to me, but I couldn’t very well be looking between her legs at her pink panties because that is EXACTLY what I’d see if I was facing her since I’m ‘lower’ than she is on the desk. Rest assured, if I were single, I’d probably be looking, lol, yes – I am a guy.
The other guy got a kick out of it and I was sure I could see a little drool on the side of his mouth, but I was totally trying to avoid looking ‘there’. Girls probably get a kick out of teasing guys like that 😛 For some reason, I have this obligation to “be a good boy” and not do something that would compromise my loyalty to my girlfriend. After all, I should not be looking at another girl’s … err.. crotch area, EVEN if she completely intended to let us look. The point is girls definitely know how to play our desires against us and I’m pretty sure I would’ve gave it a 2nd.. 3rd.. maybe even 4th look had I not been in a relationship, haha. The thing was the other guy was married and he still had no qualms about looking 😆 – damn it, why must girls do such things?!
This morning, I had a lot of fun talking to one of my authors, Poh Ching, for quite a lengthy period of time.. or well, more than we normally do! It made me really think and take time to cherish the way humans connect with one another. For those who don’t know, I met P.C simply through my blog when I started… she was my first subscriber and consequently, the first commenter on my blog. In the past, we do not spend much time talking because of our opposite time-zones and her field-of-study requires her to concentrate a lot on school. We get sporadic chats if we’re lucky, maybe 10-20 mins every week, yet, we have a fairly unique friendship and connect in ways that doesn’t seem plausible for people who have never met in person and quite literally a random person off the internet.
Nevertheless, we often share things we don’t with anyone else, talk about many personal things and enjoy each-others company. It certainly feels weird to feel so close to someone who we know “little about” – yet in a profound way, know a lot of things. It’s hard to describe the feeling, but it makes me ponder the bonds which tie humans together. There have been times she’s kept me sane at work, like that time I was talking to her over MSN in the middle of a meeting because I was ready to fall asleep, haha. Speaking of which, P.C, I loved the convo today 😀 lololol. Not only do I really enjoy talking to her, she brings a sense of happiness to my day, especially the past few days after she has finished all her exams and truly have time to dedicate herself to an entire conversation! We talked from morning, to afternoon, to even when I got home from work 😀 She made my day with a nice little comment… wish I got to hear this more often 😆 :
For Victoria Day, my friends and I visited this newly opened restaurant at a nearby city and it was amazing. I’m pretty picky about my food quality, especially when eating Japanese food because when it comes to sushi and sashimi, it must be fresh and sanitary, otherwise, you risk catching food poisoning very easily due to the nature of the ingredients. For those who are unaware, most all-you-can-eat Japanese food places do not offer sashimi for lunch but will for dinner since the cost for dinner meals tend to be a lot more. This restaurant though, offered sashimi at lunch too and oh my god did I ever over-indulge 😛 Let’s just say we had our lunch at 12PM and I didn’t have to eat dinner or anything that entire night, haha. Wow, now I totally crave it… URG!
Oh… right, back to today… if you can’t tell, I’m one of those really messy writers because I have thoughts in random places and time, so things never seem to be in chronological order, hah. This morning I also had a monitor-swivel arm installed! I no longer have to use an old server book I had to boost up my monitor, lol.. and my desk looks much neater with extra space now! Yes yes, I get impressed by small things, hey, why not… since I generally don’t get a lot of “big things” in life that make me happy… unless I also happen to win that lottery ticket our staff pooled together 😛
And finally… today… the game I’ve been waiting for for a while finally became available! I should mention I played about 4 hours of it.. yes, that’s totally bad. However, for those who are interested in games and such, definitely take a look at Alpha Protocol! It is addicting and I really didn’t want to put it down, but I also told myself I have to get back to watching my Hong Kong TVB drama series before I fall behind! I have to conclude this random-ass-post so I can get back to watching it as a distraction for me from playing AP again, haha. Speaking of Hong Kong… I suppose I should start spotting out flights for my end-of-the-year trip back home! From what I hear, the prices are supposed to be nasty. Oh well, it’s a vacation, so who cares about the money! I work damn hard for my money, now it’s time I get to enjoy it before I have to spend it on the wife and kids, lol.
Night night everyone, thanks for enduring my ramblings 😛